Past Uncovered
by xxkittykatxx
Summary: Its been over twenty years since the last hungers games and the rebellion. Peeta and Katniss's kids have no idea about their parents past and their involvement in the games and the rebellion. So what happens when their daughter Rose finds a book called the Hunger games and decides to read them with her friends.
1. Chapter 1

Past Uncovered

**Author Notes: **This is my first attempt at a Hunger games fan fiction. I've read a lot of these characters read the books, mostly about Harry Potter and the Twilight series but never about the Hunger Games, I haven't done nearly enough research to know if such stories exist (they probably do). This isn't the main character's reading the books, such as, Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Haymitch etc reading the books, no this is their children discovering the books. For the point of this story they know nothing about the hunger games or their parents' involvement in the games or the rebellion, I always imagine that Katniss and Peeta, not telling their children about the horrible past. Imagine finding these books about your family, the unedited version it must be scarring in itself, to know your parents, have gone through unimaginable horror, and have to kill people to survive. Well this is how I imagine they would react.

**Character's involved:**

Rose Mellark: Katniss and Peeta's daughter.

Matthew Mellark: Katniss and Peeta's son.

Finnick Odair Jr (Finn): Annie and Finnick's son.

Sophie Hawthorne: Gale's Daughter

Ryan Dale: Johanna's son.

Other character's will appear later in the story but these are the main 5.

**Chapter 1**

Rose Mellark crawled across the grass, quietly trying to improve her view of the rabbit, she approached the rabbit quietly not wanting to scare the thing off. Stealth was the most important thing when hunting, never mind how small or big the prey was, any slight noise could make the animal run. Rose raised her bow and aimed it at the defenceless animal, she knew that her aim wasn't as good as her Mother's but she wasn't a bad shot either, better than a lot of people could ever dream of becoming. Right when Rose let go of the arrow, a rustling behind her made the rabbit run in fear, making the arrow miss completely and embedding itself in the tree behind the rabbit. Rose got to her feet ready to confront whoever made her miss her shot.

"Wow, now that was embarrassing," the unmistakable voice of Finnick Odair came from behind her laughing.

"Damn you Finn, you made me miss," Rose shouted, turning around to face him, he was standing right behind her, one look in his blue/ green eyes made her anger fade though. Even though she would never admit it to him, his presence alone made her calmer, well until he started speaking that was.

"It's not my fault your aim sucks," Finn defended himself. Rose raised her bow and pointed it at Finn, making Finn raise his hands in mock defeat.

"What was that about my aim?"

"You wouldn't hurt your best friend would you?"

"You mean Ryan and Sophie, no your right I could never hurt them. You I just tolerate," Rose said a smile playing on her lips not able to keep a straight face. Out of the five children it was her and Finn who were the closest, them being the oldest, they bonded the most. Even though Finn was five years older than Rose, they practically grew up together, even though they were from different districts, Finn and his mother Annie, visited often along with Ryan and his parents Johanna and Zack.

"What are you doing here anyway fish boy?" Rose asked dropping her bow and putting it on the ground.

"Don't you remember, it's that time of year again," Finn said not going into any details; Rose knew what he was talking about. Every year, a select number of families from all over Panem come to District twelve for a celebration that lasted a few days, all the schools and shops would close in preparation for this special day. But Rose's parents had never told her what it was for just said it was to celebrate the ending of a particular dark period in their history, but refused to say any more than that. Her parent's, Finn's Mum, Ryan's parents and Sophie's mum and Dad went every year but from what I could tell from Mum, it was more of an obligation than a desire to go, actually none of the adults liked going, especially Mum and Finn's Mum. Our Uncle Haymitch was invited to go every year but he down right refused and was usually left in charge of looking after us kids instead, much to his dismay. They were never allowed to go, but when Finn turned eighteen they usually left them alone.

"Oh right the mysterious party. Did you try and ask your Mum about it again?" Rose asked. Finn's face turned serious when Rose asked about his mother, must not have gone well.

"Yes, but she just ignored me and would pretend that I didn't say anything. The moment I tried to bring the subject up again, she had one of her episodes," Finn said settling down on a big rock, Rose sat down next to him, she knew how hard it was for him to discuss his Mum's issues. "She started to sing to herself and covered her ears; she locked herself in her room for three days until she came out again acting like nothing happened."

Rose never knew what happened to Aunt Annie, her Mum and Dad never told them, said that they were too young to understand. Rose only witnessed one of her episodes, once when she was eight years old; her and Matthew had gone to visit Finn in District four and while Matthew was talking, Aunt Annie had suddenly started screaming at the top of her voice, after taking Annie upstairs Peeta had immediately taken them home. Matthew blamed himself but Peeta had explained softly that Annie was different because of something that happened in the past, something that she couldn't control and that Matthew was not to blame, they never asked again why Aunt Annie had these episodes. Finn only ever mentioned them when they were alone; Rose thought it must have been easier with someone to talk to.

"I'm sorry Finn," Rose whispered not knowing what else to say. Even though Rose was happy that Finn trusted her enough to talk to her about it, she still felt uncomfortable and unsure of what to say.

"It's not your fault Rose. I just wish that I could do more for her, I feel so useless when she has her moments, and I just want to know what's going on inside her head at that moment of time. Its time like these that I wish that I could turn to Dad for advice, I'm sure he'd know what to do." Finn's dad had died before he was even born, all Rose knew about Finn's Dad were the thing that her parents would say and they were very little, apparently Finn looked a lot like him and acted like him too.

"You know you can talk to my Dad, I'm sure he could help," Rose offered but knowing that her Dad wouldn't be much comfort to him.

"Thanks, but it's really more of a father, son conversation," Finn said, sadness in his eyes. Even though he never said it, Rose knew he was thinking about the fact that a father, son conversation would never happen. Rose wrapped her arm around him, hoping that would be enough to give him support. She couldn't imagine ever being able to go home and speak to her Father, even though she was close to her mother, it was her father she went to for advice and sometimes she felt like she took for granted having a father to talk things over with.

"Maybe not, but he could shed some light on why your Mum has these episodes," Rose said. She knew both her parents knew what happened in Annie's past to make her like this but they weren't willing to tell their children what happened. Rose knew it must have been terrible, why else would they keep it from her and especially Finn.

"It's not your Father's place to tell, if Mum wanted me to know, she'd tell me herself," Finn reasoned. Rose understood that but she hated the idea that her parents were lying to her or purposely withholding information about their past. But she knew that, both of her parents weren't telling her the truth about their lives, they never spoke about their childhood or even how they met.

Rose didn't say anything else just let Finn be alone with his thoughts, if he needed her he'd say something. Her father always said you have to know when to stop talking and just be there for someone. After ten minutes of staring into space, Finn jumped to his feet.

"We better get going, Sophie and Ryan are here and their wanting to see you," Finn said sounding like his normal self again, offering his hand to help Rose up.

"Ok then," Rose said accepting his hand to pull herself up.

"But thanks for listening though Rosie," Finn said smiling.

"You're welcome," Rose replied. She was glad she was able to help. "By the way Odair if you ever call me Rosie again I will use that bow and arrow for real on you." Her words didn't get the desired effect on him.

"I would start practicing then Rosie, I've seen you shoot and I run a lot faster than that rabbit," Finn said laughing not even a little bit scared.

"Or maybe I will get Mum to do a bit of target practice on your ass." Finn's smile dropped instantly and he stopped laughing. That was the reaction she wanted

XOXOXOXOXOXOX

As they walked to Rose's house, they passed through the town. As they walked past the oldest house's in the neighbourhood, the part of the town that wasn't rebuilt after the fire, over twenty years ago. Rose paused at the house that her Mum always pointed out to her, her Mum's childhood home. It was a tiny house; it barely looked big enough to hold one person never mind a family of four, her mother must have been poor, if this small house was where she grew up.

"This was Mum's childhood home," Rose said before Finn could ask why they'd stopped.

"It's nice, real spacious," Finn commented.

"It was destroyed in the fire genius. I've never even looked inside," Rose said ready to move on, not knowing why she even stopped he went past this house all the time. Rose turned to Finn who was already at the boarded up door, taking down the boards, so they could get inside.

"What are you doing?" Rose demanded.

"Aren't you curious what it looks like inside, your always complaining about not knowing anything about your parents past, maybe this place will have the answers?" Finn did have a point, but it felt wrong to break into her mother's old house, without her permission.

"Its vandalism and not to mention breaking and entering," Rose said looking around her furiously hoping no one see's what they are doing.

"What am I going to do, mess this place up more? Besides the place looks like it has been abandoned for years, I don't think the police are going to bat an eye lid about us looking into an old home that belongs to your family anyway." Finn tore off the last bit of the door and swung the door open, and gestured for Rose to go in first.

"Five minutes and we're out of here," Rose mumbled entering carefully in the crumbling house. Rose took a look around the room that was obviously used to be the kitchen slash living room. The fire had destroyed everything, beyond recognition, no wonder her Mum never wanted to speak about the fire.

"How did your family even survive this?" Finn asked.

"Mum wasn't home and apparently a family friend helped her Mother and sister escape," Rose said blankly, trying to hide the tears that were forming. Not saying another word, Rose entered the other room that must have been the bedroom; this room was just as destroyed as the other room. But someone had obviously been here since the fire, as there were a bunch of boxes, which obviously never been in the fire, but had been untouched for years, as they were gathering dust on the tops. To her knowledge no one had been in this house after the fire, but why keep this house to store old boxes. She knew that whatever was in those boxes, were none of her business, but her curiosity got the best of her and she knelt beside them and opened one of them up. Most of the boxes contained old clothes and toys which probably belonged to her Mum's little sister Primrose. Like most of her Mother's past, Rose didn't know much about Primrose, except that she had died young and it hit her mother hard, Rose didn't like to ask about her Aunt, as she knew it upset her Mum. On the top of a box, there was a broach, a circular gold pin with a small bird in the middle, Rose recognised the bird it was a Mockingjay, and her mum had told her about them.

"What's that?" Finn asked pointing to the broach in my hand.

"Just some old broach," Rose dismissed it and passed it to him. Finn looked it over and then put it back in the box. Not wanting to look through any more boxes, Rose stood up and made my way to the door.

"Let's go Finn, we shouldn't be here," Rose said but Finn was too busy looking at some book to pay attention to me.

"Rosie, what is your mother's maiden name again?" Finn asked to her surprise he knew what her mother's name was.

"Everdeen, you know that Finn," Rose replied but Finn didn't look up but his eyebrows furrowed together in deep concentration. "Why do you ask?" That brought Finn's attention back to her.

"Oh no reason, let's go," Finn said jumping to his feet shoving the book back in the box and started to lead Rose out the door but her interests had been piped by his reaction to that book. Rose dodged his arm and grabbed the book from the box. "Rose, don't." Too late the book was already in her hands. 'The Hunger Games' it said she had never heard of it. Finn tried to grab the book from her hands but she dodged it and ran to the side of the room, flipping the book over to read the description on the back.

**Losing will make you famous. Losing means certain death.**

**In a dark vision of the future, twelve boys and twelve girls are forced to appear in a live TV show called the hunger games. There is only one rule: kill or be killed.**

**When sixteen year old Katniss Everdeen steps forward to take her sister's place in the games, she sees it as death sentence. But Katniss has been close to death before. For her, survival is second nature.**

When she had read the summary, Rose dropped the book and just stared at her now empty shaking hands. She couldn't believe it, it must be a lie, it was obviously some made up story, and it was just some kind of a coincidence that it had her mother's name on the back.

"Rosie," Finn said coming towards her and put his hand on her shoulder.

"It's a lie Finn, it's not real," Rose shouted, the tears were coming now thick and fast.

"I know Rosie, I know, let's leave and forget about the book," Finn said smoothly to her. That was easier said than done, now she has seen the book it will always be at the back of her mind. Did this book hide the answers to all the questions she's ever had about her parent's? Now she's seen it, she knew that she had to read it.

"Why does it have my mum's name on it Finn?" Rose said calming down a bit now but only a bot.

"I don't know, maybe it's just a coincidence, maybe your Mum was a friend of the author and she used your mum as inspiration for the main character," Finn reasoned. That could be true, but Rose didn't believe it, she had never heard of this Suzanne Collins, if they were such close friends surely she would have said something to Rose about her.

"Then why hide the book?" Rose questioned. "Do you think this is what she has been hiding from me?"

"No," Finn answered immediately without thinking about it. "If these so called death games existed don't you think we would have heard about them by now?" Rose didn't respond she just picked the book from the ground and threw it in her backpack. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to read it," Rose answered.

"Why would you do that?"

"I want answers if my parents won't tell me, maybe this book will." Finn sighed and picked the other two books he found in the box and passed them to Rose.

"Maybe these will help as well," Finn said. Rose didn't say anything she just put the books into her bag as well. "Don't read them alone, wait until me, Ryan, Sophie and Matthew are with you."

"Why?"

"For support, I have a feeling these books aren't a real feel good story and you should have people around you when you read them."

"Thanks but I don't want Matthew reading these books if they are as bad as I'm imagining them in my head," Rose refused.

"He's fifteen Rose hardly a child. If these books turn out to be about your Mum don't you think he has the right to read them as much as you do?" Finn argued.

"Your right, let's go and meet up with them now," Rose said leaving the house.


	2. Chapter 2

Past Uncovered

**Chapter 2**

As Rose and Finn entered Rose's house, Matthew, Ryan and Sophie were waiting for them to arrive, talking on the couch. Sophie jumped up when Rose entered and gave her a huge hug, it had been a few months since they last seen each other.

"What took you two so long? Stopped for a quickie on the way over did we," Ryan said wriggling his eye brows suggestively.

"Exactly," Finn answered, that got an answering smack from Rose.

"In your dreams Odair," Rose retorted.

"How do you know what I dream about Mellark? Stay out of my head," Finn said covering his ears.

"Like there would be a lot to see in your head, food, sleeping, fishing and swimming," Rose snorted.

"I don't think that's all he thinks about, I'm sure he thinks about you, more than anything else," Sophie said, making Finn blush.

"Can we please stop talking about my sister and best friend together? It's disturbing," Matthew pleaded.

"I agree, me and Finn together, that's the kind of thing that should only exist in Nightmare's and horror movies," Rose said shuddering.

"So you admit, you do dream about me," Finn joked but everyone saw the hurt in his eyes, well everyone except Rose.

"Can we get to the reason we were late?" Rose said desperate to read the books that she had found.

"Are you sure that's a good idea Rose?" Finn said, still thinking that reading this book would cause more problems than they would solve.

"We've been through this, there's no way I'm not reading the books," Rose said, pulling the books out of her bag.

"Can we all be included in this conversation please?" Ryan interrupted them.

"On the way home from hunting me and Finn went into Mum's childhood home, out of curiosity. Inside there were boxes that hadn't been touched by the fire and inside these boxes were three books that had Mum's name on them," Rose explained. Matthew grabbed the book from Rose's and as he read the description all the blood drained from his face.

"This can't be real," Matthew whispered. Ryan fed up of being left out of the loop grabbed the book from Matthew who gave the book up willingly.

"Bloody hell," was all Ryan could say after reading it and passing the book to Sophie.

"Of course it can't be real, who would ever think of doing such a barbaric show, it's disgusting," Sophie said dismissively, putting the book on the table.

"It's been done before," Matthew pointed out.

"Yes over two thousand years ago, I like to think that humanity has moved on from this kind of so called entertainment. If this was really Katniss that the book was talking about, it can't have been more than twenty years ago, it says that she was sixteen when this happened," Sophie said, always the voice of reason.

"So the question is what happened in the past that someone would create such a thing? And why have they stopped now?" Rose said believing that it was too much of a coincidence that this book was made up.

"I think we will have to read it, to know that and maybe it will prove that the story is a fake," Finn said, praying to god or whoever would listen, for the sake of Rose and Matthew's sanity, that this book is fake.

"I guess so," Matthew relented, to everyone's surprise Matthew hated anything to do with violence.

"Are you sure?" Sophie asked. Matthew just nodded his head in answer. "Guess we're reading the books." Everyone made themselves comfortable on the couch as Rose picked up the book to read.

"Rose I can read if you want," Finn offered, knowing how hard it would be for Rose.

"I can handle it," Rose said but taking a deep breath before starting.

**Part one: The tributes**

"What are tributes?" Ryan asked.

"I'm guessing the children who are picked for these games," Finn answered.

**Chapter 1**

**When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold. My fingers stretch out seeking Prim's warmth but finding only the rough canvas cover of the mattress.**

"Who's Prim?" Ryan asked.

"Our Mum's little sister, she died a long time ago, way before me or Rose were born," Matthew answered.

"They had to share a bed?" Sophie wondered out loud.

"Not everyone can afford to have their own bed Sophie," Matthew said.

**She must have had bad dreams and climbed in with our mother. Of course she did. This is the day of the reaping.**

"What's the reaping?" Sophie asked.

"Probably where they pick out who will take part in these games," Ryan said. Both Matthew and Rose shuddered at this.

**I prop myself up on one elbow, There's enough light in the bedroom to see them. My little sister, Prim, curled up on her side, cocooned in my mother's body, their cheeks pressed together.**

"They also had to share a room with their mother?" Ryan asked.

"Well yeah, Rose and I have seen the house, it was barely big enough to swing a cat in, I highly doubt there was enough room for everyone to have their own room," Finn said. All the children, had been brought up with a reasonable amount of money, even though they weren't millionaire's, they lived in moderate size house's and never had to share a room with anyone never mind a bed.

**In sleep, my mother looks younger, still worn but not so beaten-down. Prim's face is as fresh as a rain drop, as lovely as the primrose for which she was named.**

"Your Aunt's name was Primrose?" Finn asked sniggering.

"Yes, I was named after her," Rose replied annoyed.

"Your one to talk Finnick," Ryan said. Finn stopped laughing immediately.

"I was named after my father," Finn said proudly.

"And I was named after my Auntie, anyway Primrose is a nice name," Rose said.

"Is that why you shorten it to Rose?" Finn countered.

"Rose is just easier to say," Rose replied.

"Yeah whatever," Finn said not believing her.

**My mother was beautiful once, too. Or so they tell me.**

**Sitting at Prim's knees, guarding her is the world's ugliest cat. Mashed in nose, half of one ear missing, eyes the colour of rotting squash.**

"That's one butt ugly cat," Ryan said.

"Stop it, all living things are beautiful," Sophie said defending the cat, that she didn't even know.

"Well you have to tell yourself that," Ryan said patting her arm. Sophie knocked his arm away.

**Prim named him Buttercup, insisting that his muddy yellow coat matched the bright flower. He hates me.**

Everyone laughed at that.

**Or at least distrusts me. Even though it was years ago, I think he still remembers how I tried to drown him in a bucket when Prim brought him home.**

"It's funny how cats can be touchy about people trying to kill them," Ryan said still laughing.

"Mum has never been much of an animal person," Matthew said.

"Only when hunting them," Rose finished.

**Scrawny kitten, belly swollen with worms, crawling with fleas.**

"Still think he's beautiful Sophie?" Ryan asked. Sophie responded by putting her middle finger up to him.

**The last thing I needed was another mouth to feed. But Prim begged so hard, cried even, I had to let him stay. It turned out Ok. My mother got rid of the vermin and he's a natural born mouser, even catches the occasional rat. Sometimes, when I clean a kill I feed buttercup the entrails. He has stopped hissing at me.**

"Cats are easy to win over, give them food and they shut up," Finn said.

"Just like you then Finn," Rose said.

**Entrails. No hissing, this is as closest we will ever get to love.**

**I swing my legs off the bed and slide on my hunting boots, supple leather that has moulded to my feet. I put on trousers, a shirt, tuck my long dark braid up into a cap and grab my forage bag.**

"Wow your Mum used to wear her hair in a braid even back then?" Sophie commented. Katniss was never really seen without her hair in a braid, it was kind of her signature hairstyle now.

"Doesn't surprise me, Mum has never been one for hair and makeup and fashion statements," Rose said. Even though Rose wasn't really a girly girl, she bothered with her appearance more than her mother; she usually wore her hair down or put it in a ponytail when hunting.

**On the table, under a wooden bowlto protect it from hungry rats and cats alike, sits a perfect little goats cheese wrapped in basil leaves. Prim's gift to me on reaping day.**

"That's all she has to eat," Finn complained.

"Are you really surprised doesn't sound like their living in the lap of luxury, that little amount of food probably meant a lot back then," Sophie said.

"It is Finn we're talking about, who thinks a three course meal, is just the starter. Actually what he eats in one day could probably feed the whole of district twelve back then for a week," Rose quipped.

**I put the cheese carefully in my pocket as I slip outside. **

**Our part of district 12, nicknamed the seam, is usually crawling with coal miners heading out to the morning shift at this hour. Men and women with hunched shoulders, swollen knuckles, many of whom have long since stopped trying to scrub the coal dust out of their broken nails and the lines of their sunken faces.**

"It really sounds like a horrible place to live, this was where mum grew up," Rose whispered to herself. District 12 must have changed a lot in twenty years, even she didn't know any better, and she would have sworn it was different place all together.

**But today the black cinder streets are empty. Shutters on the squat grey houses are closed. The reaping isn't until two. May as well sleep in. If you can.**

**Our house is almost at the edge of the seam. I only have to pass a few gates to reach the scruffy field called the meadow. Separating the meadow from the woods, in fact enclosing all of district 12, is a high chain link fence topped with barbed wire loops.**

"Sounds like a prison," Finn said.

"Probably the look they were going for," Matthew replied.

**In theory, it's supposed to be electrified twenty four hours a day as a deterrent to the predators that live in the woods- packs of wild dogs, lone cougars, bears- that used to threaten our streets. **

"More like to stop people from escaping," Matthew muttered angrily.

**But since we're lucky to get two or three hours of electricity in the evenings, it's usually safe to touch.**

"Imagine only having two or three hours of electricity a day. How do they live like that?" Ryan asked.

"Probably don't have a choice, but learn to deal with it," Rose said.

**Even so, I always take a moment to listen carefully for the hum that means the fence is live, Right now, its silent as a stone. Concealed by a clump of bushes, I flatten out on belly and slide under a metre-long stretch that's been lose for years. There are several other weak spots in the fence, but this one is so close to home I almost always enter the woods here.**

**As soon as I'm in the trees, I retrieve a bow and sheath of arrows from a hollow log.**

"She's going hunting," said Rose smiling. Her favourite thing to do in the world was to go hunting with her Mum, she only wished that she was half as good as she was with a bow and arrow, which was why she went hunting all the time, not for food but to get better at it.

**Electrified or not, the fence has been successful at keeping the flesh eaters out of district 12. Inside the woods they roam freely and there are added concerns like venomous snakes, rabid animals and no real paths to follow.**

"That sounds horrible, why would Katniss even think of going out there," Sophie said shuddering.

"To hunt for food of course, it doesn't sound like they have much to eat, so she has to get food from somewhere," Matthew said.

"Besides all the dangers just make it a lot more fun," Rose said.

**But there's also food if you know where to find it. My father knew and he taught me some ways before he was blown to bits in a mime explosion.**

"Its official, the books are real," Rose whispering, putting the book down taking a deep breath gathering her thoughts before carrying on.

"How do you know?" Finn asked.

"That's how Mum told us how grandpa died, blown up in a massive explosion in the mine that killed a lot of people, they talked about it in school," Matthew explained.

**There was nothing left of him to bury. I was eleven then. Five years later, I still wake up screaming for him to run.**

"Do you think that's the nightmares Mum keeps on getting?" Matthew asked Rose.

"I don't think so, the one's she has now seem scarier and different and more vivid," Rose said. As long as Rose can remember her mother had suffered with nightmare's, some of them would have her screaming blue murder and not stopping until their father calmed her down and remind her it was only a dream and sometimes even that doesn't stop her. They never explained what the nightmares were about.

**Even though trespassing in the woods is illegal and poaching carries the severest of penalties, more people would risk it if they had weapons.**

"Who would even risk it?" Sophie asked.

"A lot of people, if that meant saving their family from starvation, I know I would risk it for my Mum," Finn said seriously. Everyone knew there wasn't much that Finn wouldn't do for his mother. "Or I would get Rose to hunt for me." Finn maybe a skilled fisherman, but he was rubbish with a bow and arrow, Rose tried to teach him a few years ago but after months of no improvement, she gave up, saying if he needed something killed with a bow and arrow run away and ring her.

**But most are not bold enough to venture out with just a knife. My bow is a rarity, crafted by my father along with a few others that I keep well hidden in the woods, carefully wrapped in waterproof covers. My father could have made good money selling them, but if the officials found out he would have been publicly executed for inciting a rebellion.**

"Bit harsh isn't it," Sophie said outraged.

"Probably thought that they'd use them as weapons," Finn explained.

"Against stuff like guns, a bow and arrow is shit though," Ryan said, getting a dirty look from Rose. "Bow and arrows are great and all but they don't have the speed and the power of a gun." Ryan rambled on, trying to defend himself.

"Depends on whose wielding the bow and arrow, in Mum's hands, they can be pretty deadly on their own," Rose said defiantly.

"Not many people are as skilled as Aunt Katniss is with a bow and Arrow," Ryan said and Rose just nodded in agreement.

**Most of the peacekeepers turn a blind eye to the few of us who hunt because they're as hungry for fresh meat as anybody is. In fact, they're among our best customers. But the idea that someone might be arming the seam would never have been allowed.**

**In the autumn, a few brave souls sneak into the woods to harvest apples. But always in sight of the meadow. Always close enough to run back to the safety of district 12 if trouble arises. "District twelve. Where you can starve to death in safety." I mutter.**

"So in other words, you either brave getting killed by an animal or starve to death," Ryan said.

"That's why aunt Katniss is so good with a bow and arrow, she had to be, she either learnt fast or watches her mother and sister die from starvation. After her father was killed she had to take over the responsibility of feeding her family," Finn said admiring her. He always knew that Katniss was strong, stronger than a lot of people men and women but he didn't realise how strong. "You hunt for fun Rose, but your mum did it to survive."

**Even here, even in the middle of nowhere, you worry someone might overhear you.**

"She was only speaking the truth," Ryan complained.

**When I was younger, I scared my mother to death, the things I would blurt out about District 12m about the people who rule our country, Panem, from the far-off city called the Capitol.**

"Wow your Mum was a rebel even when she was little," Ryan said.

"Also very smart, she knew how the country was probably being ran even then," Finn added.

"That kind of talk would get her killed though," Matthew said.

**Eventually I understood this would only lead us to more trouble. So I learned to hold my tongue and turn my features into an indifferent mask so that no one could read my thoughts.**

"A skill she still has even now," Matthew remarked.

"That's why it's so scary getting told off by Mum, you never know how mad she is, if you should give her a few minutes to vent her thoughts or run for your life," Rose added giggling at the amount of times this happened.

"Only Dad ever knows what she's thinking and even then I think she surprises him with some of her reactions."

**Do my work quietly in school. Make only polite small talk in the public market. Discuss little more than trades in the hob, which is the black market where I make most of my money. Even at home, where I am less pleasant, I avoid discussing tricky topics. Like the reaping, or food shortages or the Hunger Games. Prim might begin to repeat my words, and then where would we be.**

**In the woods waits the only person whom I can be myself with.**

"That must be Dad, Mum never talks about another person she was really close with when she was younger," Rose said, happy to hear about her mum and dad together when they were younger.

"Dad said they weren't really friends when they grew up, that they lived in different parts in the district, only seeing each other in school, even then they never spoke," Matthew reasoned.

"Who else could it be then?" Rose asked but Matthew shrugged.

**Gale.**

"Wait isn't that your Dad's name," Ryan asked Sophie.

"Yeah, but it's not him, Dad didn't know Katniss when he was younger, he would have told me if they were friends or not," Sophie said brushing off the idea.

**I can feel the muscles in my face relaxing, my pace quickening as I climb the hills to our place, a rock ledge overlooking a valley. A thicket of berry brushes protects it from unwanted eyes. The sight of him waiting there brings on a smile.**

It was weird to read about her Mum being like this with anyone but her Dad but Rose felt the same way when Finn visited.

**Gale says I never smile except in the woods.**

"All the things that Aunt Katniss has to go through, I don't think I'd smile much either," Ryan said.

"**Hey Catnip," says Gale. My real name is Katniss but when I first told him, I had barely whispered it. So he thought I'd said Catnip. Then when this crazy lynx started following me around the woods looking for hand outs it became his official nickname for me.**

"Nice nickname, to be stuck with," Finn said laughing. "See, Rosie isn't that bad, I could call you a lot worse." The one thing that Rose hated being called was Rosie, but Finn was insistent on calling her that. He was the only one that got away with calling her Rosie.

**I finally had to kill the lynx because he scared of game. I almost regretted it because he wasn't bad company. But I got a decent price for his pelt.**

"**Look what I shot." Gale holds up a loaf of bread with an arrow stuck in it, and I laugh. Its real bakery bread, not the flat, dense loaves we make from our grain rations.**

"I wonder if that's the bread from Dad's family Bakery," Matthew wondered.

"Probably, there's only one bakery in District 12 now," Finn answered.

**I take it in my hands, pull out the arrow and hold the puncture in the crust to my nose, inhaling the fragrance that makes my mouth flood with saliva. Fine bread like this Is for special occasions.**

**"Mm, still warm," I say. He must have been at the bakery at the crack of dawn to trade for it. "What did it cost you?"**

**"Just a squirrel. Think the old man was feeling sentimental this morning," says Gale. "Even wished me luck."**

**"Well, we all feel a little closer today don't we?" I sat, not even bothering to roll my eyes. "Prim left us a cheese." I pull it out.**

**His expression brightens at the treat. **

"Cheese is considered a treat?" Finn complained.

"If food is as sparse as it was back then, it must have been. Any food was probably a treat." Rose answered.

"I wouldn't last five minutes, in those conditions," Finn pointed out.

"You can fish, so I'm sure you'd survive," Ryan said.

**"Thank you, Prim. We'll have a real feast."**

"Is he being sarcastic, that's a snack not a feast," Finn said.

"Back then though," Rose tried explaining again.

"Don't bother Rose he's not going to understand," Sophie said cutting her off.

**Suddenly he falls into a capitol accent as he mimics Effie Trinket,**

"Wait a second isn't Effie a friend of your parents?" Sophie asked Matthew and Rose.

"Friend is putting it strongly, Mum tolerates her," Rose answered.

"Dad likes her," Matthew said.

"Dad likes everyone," Rose pointed out.

**the maniacally upbeat woman who arrives once a year to read out the names at the reaping.**

"That definitely sounds like Effie," Finn said.

"Wait a second Effie were part of these games, no wonder Mum dislikes her," Rose said horrified.

**"I almost forgot! Happy Hunger Games!"**

"That makes it sound like it's a holiday, like Christmas," Sophie said.

"Probably was for the capital," Ryan said.

"Oh yes, watching a bunch of kids kill each other, is a reason to celebrate," Sophie scoffed.

**He plucks a few blackberries from the bushes around us. "And may the odds-" He tosses a berry in a high arc towards me.**

**I catch it in my mouth and break the delicate skin with my teeth. The sweet tartness explodes across my tongue. "-be ever in your favour!" I finish with equal verve.**

"May the odds be ever in your favour?" Rose mocked. "What a horrible tagline?"

"Effective though," Finn countered.

**We have to joke about it because the alternative is to be scared out of your wits. Besides the Capitol aaccent is screening affected, almost anything sounds funny in it.**

"That's true, I can barely get through a conversation without laughing," Ryan said.

**I watch as Gale pulls out a knife and slices the bread. He could be my brother. Straight black hair, olive skin; we even have the same he grey eyes.**

"That sounds like your Dad Sophie," Ryan said.

"It's not him, he's not from district 12, that could be anyone," Sophie argued but she wasn't confident about it herself but she had to remind herself that he father wouldn't lie about not knowing Katniss.

**But we're not related, at least not closely. Most of the families who work the mines resemble one another this way.**

**That's why my mother and Prim, with their light hair and blue eyes, always look out of place. They are. My mother's parents were part of the small merchant class that caters to officials, peacekeepers and the occasional Seam customer. They ran an apothecary shop in District 12. Since almost no one can doctors, apothecaries are our healers.**

"That's just wrong, everyone should have access to a proper doctor," Sophie complained.

"Guess the Capitol didn't care about other districts health care, only about them. They probably wouldn't blink an eye if everyone in the district would keel over and die," Rose said.

"They probably would, who would cater to their needs then, the city would fall apart without the districts," Finn said.

**My father got to know my mother because on his hunts he would sometimes collect medicinal herbs and sell them to her shop to be brewed into remedies. She must have really loved him to leave her him for the Seam. I try to remember that when all I can see is the woman who sat by, blank and unreachable, while her children turned to skin and bones. I try to forgive her for my Father's sake. But to be honest, I'm not the forgiving kind.**

"She was grieving her dead husband," Sophie argued.

"That's no excuse she should have done something while her children starved to death. I could never sit by and do nothing, losing your husband is no excuse." The moment the words were out of her mouth Rose remembered about Finn and all the things he went through with his mother.

"I wasn't talking about Aunt Annie, she wasn't as bad as that anyway," Rose defended herself but she still felt horrible.

"There would be days that, Mum wouldn't look at me or talk to me or even come out of her room," Finn said clearly upset.

"You don't know if that was over your Dad. Anyway them days are only now and again, she's a great mum and you know it," Rose said not wanting to upset Finn anymore.

"Yeah she is, but it's still he's to see her like that. Just remember Rose you don't know what people are going through."

**Gale spreads the bread slices with the soft goat's cheese, carefully placing a basil leaf on each while I strip the bushes of their berries. We settle back in a nook in the rock. From this place, we ate invisible, but have a clear view of the valley, which is teeming with summer life, greens to gather, roots to dig, fish iridescent in the sunlight. The day is glorious, with a blue sky and soft breeze. The food's wonderful, with the cheese seeping into the warm bread and the berries bursting in our mouths. Everything would be perfect if this really was a holiday, if all the day meant was domain the mountains with Gale, hunting for tonight's supper. But instead we have to be standing in the square at 2 o' clock waiting for the names to be called out.**

"That definitely would ruin your day," Ryan said without humour.

"I don't think I could handle that kind of stress every year, not knowing if my name, or families name, or a friend's name would be called," Rose said solemnly.

**"We could do it, you know," Gale said quietly.**

**"What?" I ask.**

**"Leave the district. Run off. Live in the woods. You and I, we could make it," says Gale.**

"Why don't they then?" Ryan wondered.

"It's not as easy as that, they still have families to take care of," Matthew pointed out.

"Why would they want to live in the woods anyway?" Sophie asked.

"Well the woods sound a lot more appealing than taking part in the hunger games," Finn answered.

**I don't know how to respond. The idea is preposterous.**

**"If we didn't have so many kids," he adds quickly. They're not our kids of course. But they might as well be. Gale's two little brothers and a sister.**

Ryan raised an eye brow at Sophie, who has many Aunts and Uncles.

"It's not my Dad," Sophie insisted.

"Are you sure Sophie? He sounds like your Dad," Matthew asked.

**And you may as well throw in our mother's too, because how would they live without us? Who would fill those mouths that are always asking for more? With both of submitting daily, there are still nights when game has to be swapped for lard or shoelaces or wool, still nights when we go to bed with our stomachs growling.**

"The two of them really had to grow up quickly didn't they, they had to be the adults in the household, be more like parents than siblings to the younger children," Finn said , clearly admiring them for their strength.

**"I never want to have kids," I said.**

"Mum never wanted kids," Matthew asked shocked.

"Why wouldn't she want kids, it's not like we're that bad," Rose scoffed annoyed forgetting that her mother was only sixteen at the time she said this.

"She probably didn't want children growing up in that environment. Imagine having children and having the knowledge that they could have to take part in the hunger games. If my children had to live through that I wouldn't want any either," Finn reasoned.

"So what changed her mind?" Rose asked still angry. She hated the thought that her Mother never wanted her, was her and Matthew just an accident.

**"I might if I didn't live here," says Gale.**

**"But you do," I say irritated.**

**"Forget it," he snaps back.**

"I think Gale means that he wants children with Katniss," Sophie said smiling.

"No!" Both Matthew and Rose shouted

"Oh come on he clearly wanted to run away with her, Its obvious he's in love with her," Sophie said thinking how romantic it is.

"Mum belongs with my Dad and no one else," Matthew said and Rose nodded.

"Doesn't mean that he was the only one who loved her," Sophie pointed out.

**The conversation feels all wrong. Leave? How could I leave Prim, who is the only person in the world I'm certain I love.**

"What about her mother?" Sophie said finding it hard to believe that any daughter wouldn't love their own mother.

"It doesn't like she's that close to her Mother," Finn replied.

"What about Dad?" Rose complained.

"Doesn't sound like she knows your Dad yet," Finn answered again.

**And Gale is devoted to his family. We can't leave, so why bother talking about it? And even if we did... even if we did... where did this stuff about having kids come from? There's never been anything romantic between Gale and me. **

"Doesn't mean that Gale doesn't want anything romantic to happen between them," Sophie said. Rose shuddered at this, hating the idea that someone else might have been interested in her mother.

**When we met, I was a skinny twelve year old, and although he was only two years older, he already looked like a man. It took time for us to even become friends, to stop haggling over every trade and begin helping each other out.**

"Well Mum has never been good at making friends," Rose said.

**Besides, if he wants kids, Gale won't have any trouble finding a wife. He's good-looking, he's strong enough to handle the work in the mines, and he can hunt. You can tell by the way girls whisper about him when he walks by in school that they want him.**

"I had that problem all the time in school, had to practically beat them off with a stick. But that's the price you pay for being this beautiful," said Fin cockily, running his fingers through his hair. Rose snorted in response.

"If they are whispering about you Finn, it's not because of your looks it because they think you're a bit slow and they feel sorry for you," Rose said. Sophie hid a smile; Rose knew that all the girls were after Finn in District 4 and that Rose hated that. But Sophie also knew that Finn would turn them all down if he had a shot with Rose.

**It makes me jealous, but not for the reason people would think. Good hunting partners were hard to find.**

"I'm sure, it's more than just losing your hunting partner Katniss," Sophie said, earning a dirty look from Rose.

"**What do you want to do?" I ask. We can hunt, fish or gather.**

"Well that easy, you fish obviously," Finn answered for him.

"**Let's fish at the lake. We can leave our poles and gather in the woods. Get something nice for tonight," he says.**

**Tonight. After the reaping, everyone is supposed to celebrate.**

"Why would you celebrate such a horrible event, children are being sent off to die, probably people they know?" Sophie complained.

"For the Capitol it is a reason to celebrate," Finn pointed out.

"In the Capitol yes, but not in the district's you pray for the children's safe return," Sophie replied.

**And a lot of people do, out of relief that their children have been spared for another year.**

"I still wouldn't celebrate; it's still children getting killed. How can people even celebrate the fact that soon a neighbour could be mourning the death of a child?" Rose said.

**But at least two families will pull their shutters, lock their doors, and try and figure out how they will survive the painful weeks to come.**

**We do well. The predators ignore us on a day when easier, tastier prey abounds. By late morning, we have a dozen fish, a bag of greens and, best of all, a large quantity of strawberries. I found the patch a few years ago, but Gale had the idea to string mesh nets around it to keep out the animals.**

**On the way home, we swing by the hob, the black market that operates in an abandoned warehouse that once held coal. When they came up with a more efficient system that transported the coal directly from the mines to the trains, the Hob gradually took over the space. Most businesses are closed by this time on reaping day, but the black market's still fairly busy. We easily trade six of the fish for good bread, the other two for salt. Greasy Sae, the bony old woman who sells bowls of hot soup from a large kettle, takes half the greens off our hands in exchange for a couple of chunks of paraffin. We might do a tad better elsewhere, but we make an effort to keep on good terms with Greasy Sae. She's the only one who can consistently be counted on to buy wild dog.**

"Who would want to buy wild dog?" Sophie said her face twisting in disgust.

"People, who are hungry," Matthew answered.

**We don't hunt them on purpose, but if you're attacked and you out a dog or two, well meat is meat. "Once it's in the soup, I'll call it beef," Greasy Sae says with a wink.**

"I think people could tell the difference between beef and dog," Ryan said.

"Not if they don't know what beef tastes like, bet that's a luxury as well," Finn said.

**No one in the Seam would turn up their nose at a good leg of wild dog, but the peacekeepers who come to the hob can afford to be a little choosier.**

**When we finish our business at the market, we go to the back door of the mayor's house to sell half the strawberries, knowing he has a particular fondness for them and can afford our price. The mayor's daughter, Madge, opens the door. She's in my year at school. Being the mayor's daughter, you'd expect her to be a snob, but she's alright. She just keeps to herself. Like me. Since neither of us really has a group of school friends, we seem to end up together a lot at school. Eating lunch, sitting next to each other at assemblies, partnering for sports activities. We rarely talk, which suits us both just fine.**

"I think that's Mum's way of saying that she's a friend," Rose translated.

"Coming from Mum that means a lot," Matthew carried on.

**Today her drab school outfit has been replaced by an expensive white dress, and her blonde hair is done up with a pink ribbon. Reaping clothes.**

"**Pretty dress," says Gale.**

**Madge shoots him a look, trying to see if it's a genuine compliment or if he's being ironic.**

"She's obviously not used to compliments," Ryan remarked.

"Or not used to them of Gale, their probably not friends like her and my Mum," Rose said.

**It is a pretty dress, but she would never be wearing it ordinarily.**

"Have to look pretty for the show I'm guessing," Finn said.

**She presses her lips together and then smiles. "Well, if I go to the Capitol, I want to look nice don't I?"**

"Heaven forbid," Ryan muttered.

**Now it's Gale's turn to be confused. Does she mean it? Or is she messing with him? I'm guessing the second.**

"**You won't be going to the Capitol," Gale says coolly.**

"How would he know that? I would have thought that everyone's name would be put in the draw," Matthew asked but everyone just shrugged.

**His eyes land on a small circular pit that adorns her dress. Real gold. Beautifully crafted. It could keep a family in bread for months.**

"I could never wear something so expensive, when I know people are dying from starvation around me," Finn commented clearly annoyed. "Why didn't she sell the pin and give the money to a good cause?"

"Probably never crossed her mind," Matthew said.

"**What can you have? Five entries? I had six when I was twelve years old."**

"Why would she have less entries than him, I would have thought everyone would have the same number of entries?" Sophie asked but no one answered.

"**That's not her fault," I say. **

"**No, it's no one's fault. Just the way it is," says Gale.**

**Madge's face has become closed off. She puts the money for the berries in my hand. "Good luck Katniss."**

"**You, too," I say, and the door closes.**

**We walk towards the Seam in silence. I don't like that Gale took a dig at Madge but he's right of course. The reaping system is unfair, with the poor getting the worst of it. You become eligible for the reaping the day you turn twelve.**

"That young," Sophie exclaims in surprise, tears in her eyes.

"A twelve year old, would have no chance battling to other children to death, definitely children that are older than them and more trained than them. It's a death sentence for sure, at least older children have more of a chance not much of one but they can least try," Finn said just as surprised as Sophie.

**That year, your name is entered once. At thirteen, twice. And so on and so on until you reach the age of eighteen, the final year of eligibility, when your name goes in the pool seven times. That's true for every citizen in all twelve districts in the entire country of Panem.**

**But here's the catch. Say you are poor and starving, as we are. You can opt to add your name more times in exchange for tesserae. Each tesserae is worth a meagre year's supply of grain and oil for one person. You may do this for each of your family members as well.**

"That's horrible. Who would even do such a thing?" Sophie asked.

"I would," Ryan answered immediately.

"So would I," both Rose and Matthew said as well.

"Most people would, if they were desperate. Their families would starve without that oil and grain. If I had to choose between my life and my family's life, I would do it. Without food, we would die anyway, at least with that they had a chance to survive, yes it would mean that I had more chances of being entered in the games but at least I would have a chance and so would my family," Finn explained and all the children nodded in agreement.

**So, at the age of twelve, I had my name entered four times. Once because I had to, and three times for tesserae for grain and oil for myself, Prim and my mother. In fact, every year I have needed to do this. And the entries are cumulative. So now, at the age of sixteen, my name will be entered twenty times. Gale, who is eighteen and has been either helping or single handedly feeding a family of five for seven years, will have his name in forty-two times.**

"I don't like them odds. Do you think that's why Mum never speaks about Gale? He was killed in the same games that she was forced to battle in," Matthew asked, hating that idea. Killing anyone is hard enough but imagine being forced to kill your best friend.

"I hope not," Rose said simply.

**You can see why someone like Madge, who has never been at risk of needing a tesserae, can set him off. The chance of her name being drawn is very slim compared to those of us who live in the Seam.**

"That's not fair," Sophie commented.

"None of this is fair," Finn pointed out.

**Not impossible but slim. And even though the rules were set up by the Capitol, not the Districts, certainly not Madge's family, it's hard not to resent those who don't have to sign up for tesserae.**

**Gale knows his anger at Madge is misdirected. On other days, deep in the woods, I've listened to him rant about how the tesserae are just another tool to cause misery in our district. A way to plant hatred between the starving workers of the Seam and those who can generally count on supper; and thereby ensure we will never trust one another.**

"Of course it is, they can't have all the districts being friendly, as they might band together and start a rebellion, a clever plan really," Finn said.

"**It's to the Capitol's advantage to have us divided among ourselves," he might say if there were no ears to hear but mine. If it wasn't reaping day. If a girl with a gold pin and no tesserae had not made what I'm sure she thought was a harmless comment.**

"It must be hard to see people living the good life, while you and your family struggle to find food and clothes," Rose said.

"But as Mum said that's not their fault, they were just born under better circumstances," Matthew explained.

**As we walk, I glance over at Gale's face, still smouldering underneath his stony expression. His rages seem pointless to me, although I never say so. It's not that I don't agree with him. I do. But what good is yelling about the Capitol in the middle of the woods? It doesn't change anything. It doesn't make things fair; It doesn't fill our stomach's. In fact, it scares off the nearby game. I let him yell, though. Better he does it in the woods than in the district.**

"So why don't they do something about it? Fight back," Ryan raged.

"With what? The Capitol has all the weapons and all the power. Why start a war that you have no chance of winning?" Finn reasoned. Ryan muttered under his breath but didn't argue Finn's point.

**Gale and I divide our spoils, leaving tow fish, a couple of loaves of good bread, greens, a few handfuls of strawberries, salt, paraffin and a bit of money for each of us.**

"**See you in the square," I say.**

"**Wear something pretty," he says flatly.**

"Mum will hate that, she hates dressing up," Rose said.

**At home, I find my mother and sister are ready to go. My mother wears a fine dress from her apothecary days. Prim is in my first reaping outfit, a skirt and a ruffled blouse. It's a bit big but my mother has made it with pins. Even so, she's having trouble keeping the blouse tucked in at the back.**

**A tub of warm water waits for me. I scrub off the dirt and sweat from the woods and even wash my hair. To my surprise, my mother has laid out one of her own lovely dresses for me.**

"Poor Mum she hates wearing dresses," Rose says laughing.

"I don't think I've ever seen Katniss wear a dress before," Sophie said.

"Only when they go to that party every year, she's so uncomfortable, you can tell she wants to rip it off and put on her hunting gear," Matthew remarked.

**A soft blue thing with matching shoes. **

"**Are you sure?" I ask. I'm trying to get past rejecting offers of help from her. For a while, I was so angry, I wouldn't allow her to do anything for me.**

"I couldn't imagine not relying on my Mum to help me with thing," Sophie said who was incredibly close to her mum and her Dad.

**And this is something special. Her clothes from her past are very precious to her.**

**Of course. Let's put your hair up too," she says. I let her towel-dry it and braid it up on my head. I can hardly recognise myself in the cracked mirror that leans against the wall.**

"Aunt Katniss all dressed up, no I don't think I'd recognise her either," Ryan remarked.

**"You look beautiful," says Prim in a hushed voice.**

**"And nothing like myself," I say. I hug her, because I know the next few hours will be terrible for her.**

"I couldn't even begin to imagine what they are all going through, knowing what could happen in the next few hours. It's hard just hear in about it never mind living it," Rose said quietly.

"I don't think its something that any of us imagine," says Finn.

**Her first reaping. She's as safe as you can get, since she's only entered once.**

"I think Aunt Katniss may have jinxed it saying that," Ryan said.

"It's not a jinx that got Prim's name called just very bad luck," Matthew argued.

**I wouldn't let her take out tesserae. But she's worries about me. That the unthinkable might happen.**

"I think that I'd be more worried about a family member being called than myself, especially if they have as many enteries as Mum," Rose said.

**I protect Prim in every way I can, but I'm powerless against the reaping. The anguish I always feel when she's in pain wells up in my chest and threatens t register on my face.**

"My God imagine actually showing an emotion," says Ryan regretting it immediately after seeing the looks on both Rose and Matthew's faces.

"I think she was trying to stay strong for her little sister actually," Rose answers back angrily.

**I notice her blouse has pulled out of her skirt in the back again and force myself to stay calm. "Tuck your tail in, little duck," I say, smoothing the blouse back in place.**

"Mum used to say that to me when I didn't tuck in my shirt properly. She always looked sad and distant after saying it, I didn't know why until now," admitted Rose. Finn gently gave a little squeeze to her shoulder for support.

**Prim giggles and gives a small "Quack". **

**"Quack yourself," I say with a light laugh. The kind only Prim can draw out of me. "Come on, let's eat," I say and plant a quick kiss on the top of her head.**

**The fish and greens are already cooking in a stew, but that will be for supper. We decide to save the strawberries and bakery bread for this evening's meal, to make it special, we say. Instead we drink milk from Prim's goat, Lady, and eat the rough bread made from the tesserae grain, although no one has much appetite anyway.**

"I don't think anyone could eat, knowing what was going to happen later. Well everyone except Finn that is," says Matthew.

"Food always makes everything better," Finn pointed out.

**At one o'clock, we head for the square. Attendance is mandatory unless you are on death's door.**

"I'm surprised they don't wheel you out on your death bed, to attend the ceremony," Sophie said bitterly.

"I don't think your usual I had the flu, would get you out of this ceremony Ryan," says Finn.

"Not if its man flu, I might as well be on my death bed," Ryan replied.

"Man flu isn't that another word for the sniffles," asked Rose smiling.

"It's also what Ryan uses for explaining why he ditched school again," explained Sophie.

**This evening, officials will come around and check to see if this is the case. If not, you'll be imprisoned.**

"Bit harsh for missing a little celebration," says Ryan.

"Not for the Capitol it isn't, these games are a way to show how in control they are and much power they have. How can they show how powerful they are if people aren't there to see it? If it's that easy to avoid, don't you think everyone would skip it," replied Matthew.

**It's too bad, really, that they hold the reaping in the square- one of the few places in District 12 that can be pleasant. The square's surrounded by shops, and on public market days, especially if there's good weather; it has a holiday feel to it. But today, despite the bright banners hanging on the buildings, there's an air of grimness.**

"I don't think anyone could be happy on a day like that," muttered Rose.

"Except the Capitol," Finn added.

**The camera crews, perched like buzzards on rooftops, only add to the effect.**

**People file in silently and sign in. The Capitol is a good opportunity for the Capitol to keep tabs on the population as well. Twelve- to eighteen year olds are herded into roped areas marked off by ages, the oldest in the front, the young ones, like Prim, towards the back.**

"Lining them up like cattle to the slaughter," Matthew whispered angrily.

**Family members line up around the perimeter, holding tightly to one another's hands. But there are others, too who have no one they love at stake, or who no longer care, who slip among the crowd taking bets on the two kids whose names will be drawn.**

"That's disgusting," shouted Rose.

"It's not like they can control what's happening, might as well make some money from it," Ryan said defending such people. Words, which had both Sophie and Rose glaring at him.

"They're betting on who will live and die, I mean how low you can get," fumed Sophie.

"One of them who happens to be my mother," Rose added on.

"I'm not saying that I'd ever make such a bet but I can understand other people's point of view on the matter," Ryan said trying to defend his words. Rose and Sophie were still very angry but decided to let the subject drop.

**Odds are given on their ages, whether they're Seam or merchant, if they will break down and weep.**

"I think most people would cry," says Sophie.

"I wouldn't, this is a fight to death, I wouldn't want to show weakness, show people that I'm strong," Finn said confidently.

"I'd cry, shake, scream, make myself look like the biggest wimp to all the cameras and other children," Ryan said to everyone's surprise. Ryan always liked to show how strong and barely let anyone see what he's feeling. "Everyone would automatically think that I'm not worthy of their time and leave me alone. Then I'd turn around and fight like hell and win."

"I wouldn't cry but it would be because I wouldn't want to give the Capitol the satisfaction of knowing that they'd broken me," Matthew said quietly.

**Most refuse dealing with the racketeers but carefully, carefully. These same people tend to informers, and who hasn't broken the law? I could be shot on a daily basis for hunting, but the appetites of those in charge protect me, Not everyone can claim the same.**

**Anyway, Gale and I agree that if we have to choose between hunger and a bullet in the head, the bullet would be much quicker.**

"I don't think I could be brave enough to even try such a thing," Rose said.

"I think you would be, if it meant saving your family," Finn answered.

**The space gets tighter, more claustrophobic, as people arrive. The square's quite large, but not enough to hold district 12's population of about eight thousand. Latecomers are directed to the adjacent streets, where they can watch the event on screen as it's televised live by the state.**

"I can't believe people watch this thing," Sophie said.

"I don't think they have a choice in the matter," Finn said softly.

"What about the citizen's in the Capitol? It doesn't sound like it's forced on them, it sounds like they enjoy the show," Sophie spat.

"For them it's nothing to fear, it's just a big game show, something put on for their entertainment. They probably haven't thought about how it feels for these people taking part. They grew up with these games just like everyone else, they just haven't been taught to fear them," Finn explained.

"It's still sick," Sophie muttered.

**I find myself standing in a clump of sixteen's from the Seam. We all exchange terse nods then focus our attention on the temporary stage that is set up before the Justice building, It holds three chairs, a podium and two large glass balls, one for the boys and one for the girls. I stare at the paper slips in the girls' ball. Twenty of them have Katniss Everdeen written on them in careful handwriting.**

"It makes me sick to think that Mum has her name entered so many times in that bowl," Rose said.

"I wonder how many times Dad had to have his name entered," Matthew wondered out loud.

"Probably the same amount as that Madge girl. Didn't you say that Uncle Peeta's family owned a bakery when he was a child? He wasn't from the Seam so he probably never taken a tesserae out," Finn replied which seem to satisfy Matthew.

**Two of the three chairs fill with Madge's father, Mayor Undersee, who's a tall ma, and Effie Trinket, District 12's escort, fresh from the Capitol with her scary grin, pinkish hair and spring green suit.**

"It's weird to think that Effie was a part of all this," says Matthew wondering how many other people they know were part of these games.

"I can't believe Mum would ever talk to her again, if that was me I would never want to see another Capitol person again in my lifetime," said Rose.

**They murmur to each other and then look with concern at the empty seat. **

**Just as the town clock strikes two, the mayor steps up to the podium and begins to read. It's the same story every year. He tells of the history of Panem, the country that rose up out of the ashes of a place that was once called North America. He lists the disasters, the droughts, the storms, the fires , the encroaching seas that swallowed up so much of the landm the brutal war for what little sustenance remained. The result was Panem, a shining Capitol ringed by thirteen districts, which brought peace and prosperity to its citezens.**

"That little speech makes the Capitol seem like the heroes," Ryan laughed at the idea.

"The speech was obviously made by the Capitol, they're hardly going to call themselves evil dictators that have no soul," Finn replied but agreed the idea that the Capitol was heroes was laughable.

"I would," says Ryan confidently.

"To their faces?" asks Finn.

"Maybe not," Ryan bowed down and let Rose carry on reading.

**Then came the Dark Days, the uprising of the districts against the Capitol. Twelve were defeated, the thirteenth obliterated. The treaty of treason gave us the new laws to guarantee peace and, as our yearly reminder that the Dark Days must never be repeated, it gave us the Hunger Games.**

"That's why they created the Hunger Games, because the district rebelled so many years ago," scoffed Rose.

"It seems to be unfair that they punish everyone in the districts for something that they probably had no part in," added Sophie.

"If they don't punish everyone, what will stop them rebelling again?" asked Finn.

**The rules of the Hunger games are simple. In punishment for the uprising, each of the twelve districts must provide one girl and one boy, called tributes, to participate. The twenty-four tributes will be imprisoned in a vast outdoor arena that could hold anything from a burning desert to a frozen wasteland. Over a period of several weeks, the competitors must fight to the death. The last tribute standing wins.**

"It's even worse when it's explained fully like that," Sophie shuddered.

**Taking the kids from our districts, forcing them to kill one another while we watch – this is the Capitol's way of reminding us how totally we are at their mercy.**

"Evil bastards," muttered Ryan.

**How little chance we would stand of surviving another rebellion. Whatever words they use, the real message is clear. "Look how we take your children and sacrifice them and there's nothing you can do. If you lift a finger we will destroy every last one of you. Just as we did in District thirteen."**

"That's why no one rebels. If they do this to innocent children, imagine what they'd do to adults who were disobeying their orders," Matthew said. Everyone was quiet at that moment wondering what happened in the past to make these games suddenly stop.

"What I don't understand is why bother with a battle like that? If you want to show your power why don't you take a load of people and execute them in the street and televise it live to the districts," Ryan asked.

"The games are probably very popular with the citizens of the Capitol. So they make it into some spectacular show that they can enjoy. Anyway isn't it more disturbing watching children killing each other to survive, than a bunch of Capitol authorities shooting people down in the street," explained Finn.

"I hate the idea that anyone would do such a thing," Sophie says.

"Why bother with a winner though? Why not just get them to kill each other off and kill whoever's left?" Ryan asked but Finn didn't have an answer this time.

**To make it more humiliating as well as tortuous, the Capitol requires us to treat the Hunger Games as a festivity, a sporting event pitting every district against the others, The last tribute alive receives a life of ease back home, and their district will be showered with prizes, largely consisting of food. All year, the Capitol will show the winning district gifts of grain and oil and even delicacies like sugar while the rest of us battle starvation.**

"That's why they have a winner. If they have something worth fighting for, people will fight even harder. If they have nothing to gain from the Games, everyone wouldn't fight they'd just help each other survive. The idea that you could survive and go home to your family is enough for people to fight like hell to win," says Finn.

"I don't know if I could kill anyone," Sophie said.

"It's either that or be killed yourself. I don't think anyone would kill but they would if they had to. Showing your good nature won't get you home with your family," Finn explained gently.

"**It is time for repentance and a time for thanks," intones the mayor.**

**Then he reads the list of past District 12 victors. In seventy four-year we have had exactly two.**

"They did these games for over seventy four years," says Rose shocked. She couldn't believe that these games had gone on for so long and she had heard nothing about them.

"They only had two people win in seventy-four years, I wonder what stopped District 12 winning before, were they really that crap," wondered Ryan. Rose and Matthew both glared at him for calling District 12 crap.

**Only one is still alive. Haymitch Abernathy, **

"Haymitch!" everyone exclaimed in shock. All the children knew who Haymitch was; he was like a member of the family to everyone, well except Sophie. They all liked Haymitch.

"Maybe it's just a coincidence," Matthew suggested. But it was unlikely that there were two people with the same name, definitely a name so unusual.

**A paunchy, middle aged man, who at this moment appears hollering something unintelligible, staggers on the stage, and falls into the third chair. He's drunk. Very.**

"That definitely sounds like Haymitch," says Finn recovering from the shock of hearing Haymitch's name being mentioned as a victor of these Hunger Games.

"That explains why he's always drunk. He drinks to help numb the pain and the memories of his time in the games," Sophie said. That helped her understand Haymitch a lot more now. She was never that keen on the drunk, old bitter man.

"Yeah I guess. I just never would have thought that out of everyone I know, Haymitch would have been one of the people to win these games," Ryan said shocked,

"He was probably different when he was younger, stronger and braver and he's always been smart," Matthew said. Everyone raid an eyebrow when he used the word smart to describe Haymitch. "Well when he wasn't drunk."

**The crowd responds with its token applause, but he's confused and tries to give Effie Trinket a big hug, which she barely manages to, fend off.**

**The mayor looks distressed. Since all of this is being televised, right now District 12 is the laughing stock of Panem, and he knows it.**

"Who cares what other people think?" Ryan asks.

"The fact that in Seventy four years Panem has only two victors, doesn't make look very good to the other Districts. Then their only surviving victor acts like that, I'm sure a lot of people care," Finn pointed out.

**He quickly tries to pull the attention back to the reaping by introducing Effie Trinket.**

**Bright and bubbly as ever, Effie Trinket trots to the podium and gives her signature, "Happy Hunger! And may the odds be ever in your favour!"**

"How can she be so cheerful on such a horrible day?" Rose asked annoyed.

"It's probably easy being bright and cheerful when you're not the one whose name may be called or someone's they love's name may be called," Matthew answered.

**Her pink hair must be a wig because her curls have shifted slightly off-centre since her encounter with Haymitch. She goes on a bit about what an honour it is to be here, although everyone knows she's just aching to get bumped up to a better district where they have proper victors, not drunks who molest you in front of the entire nation.**

"If she doesn't want to be there, she can piss off, no one else wants her there," Ryan spat angrily.

"She's just doing her job," Matthew responded hollowly.

"She should find a better one," Ryan fumed. He wasn't even from District 12, but he was there enough to think of it like a second home and hated people talking badly about it.

**Through the crowd, I spot Gale looking back at me with a ghost of a smile. As reaping's go, this one at least has a slight entertainment factor. But suddenly I am thinking of Gale and his forty-two names in that big glass bowl and how the odds are not in his favour. Not compared to a lot of the boys.** **And maybe he's thinking the same thing about me because his face darkens and he turns away. "But there are thousands of slips," I wish I could whisper to him.**

**It's time for the drawing. Effie Trinket says as she always does, "Ladies first!" and crosses to the glass ball with the girls' names. She reaches in, digs her hand deep into the bowl, and pulls out a slip of paper. The crowd draws in a collective breath and then you can hear a pin drop, and I'm feeling nauseous and so desperately hoping that's it's not me, that it's not me, that it's not me.**

The children have a similar reaction, even though they know whose names going to be picked.

**Effie Trinket crosses back to the podium, smoothes the slip of paper, and reads the name in a clear voice. And it's not me. **

**It's Primrose Everdeen.**

"That's the end of the chapter," Rose says emotionless putting the book down on the table.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

No one speaks for a while as they digest everything that they've just read. It was a lot to take in and this was just the first chapter, it was going to get worse later on, especially when the games begin.

"I don't think I can read again," Rose whispers.

"I will then," Finn said picking up the book from the table.

"Who do you think the boy tribute is going to be?" Ryan asked before Finn could start reading.

"Don't know but for Mum's sake I hope it's someone she doesn't know," Matthew replied as quiet as Rose was.

**One time, when I was in a tree, waiting motionless for game to wander by, I dozed off and fell three metres to the ground, landing on my back. It was as if the impact had knocked every wisp of air from my lungs, and I lay there struggling to inhale, to exhale, and to do anything.**

"Not that this isn't interesting. But what does this have to do with the reaping?" Ryan asked.

"She's describing exactly what she was feeling at that moment, idiot," Sophie muttered.

**That's how I feel now, trying to remember how to breathe, unable to speak, totally stunned as the name bounces around the inside my skull. Someone is gripping my arm, a boy from the Seam, and I think maybe I started to fall and he caught me.**

**There must be have been some mistake. This can't be happening. Prim was one slip of paper in thousands.**

"The chances of Prim's name being called were unlikely but not impossible," Finn pointed out. No one else could speak, they were all thinking of how they would have reacted if a member of family was chosen to fight in a game which they surely could never win.

**Her chances of being chosen were so remote that I'd not even bothered to worry about her. Hadn't I done everything? Taken the tesserae, refused to let her do the same?**

"Sounds like she's blaming herself," says Sophie.

"That's Mum for you, she blames herself when it's not remotely her fault," Matthew explained.

**One slip. One slip in thousands. The odds had been entirely in her favour. But it hadn't mattered.**

"Fate is a son of a bitch," Ryan muttered without humour. There was no humour in the situation.

**Somewhere far away, I can hear the crowd murmuring unhappily, as they always do when a twelve year old gets chosen, because no one thinks this is fair.**

"It is unfair, why are they just standing there watching a young girl walk to her death. Do something fight," shouts Sophie at the book.

"They know that they can't, they're outnumbered," Finn tried to explain but to him it was hard to understand why people let this happen year after year. If it was him he didn't know if he could just stand there and watch a young girl battle to death with older and more experienced children, it was sickening.

**And then I see her, the blood drained from her face, hands clenched in fists at her side's, walking with stiff, small steps up towards the stage, passing me, and I see the back of her blouse has become untucked and hangs out over her skirt.**

"The poor girl. What is she thinking?" Sophie wondered out loud.

**It's this detail, the untucked blouse forming a ducks tail that brings me back to myself.**

"Is it selfish if I wish that Mum doesn't volunteer in Aunt Prim's place," Matthew said clearly unhappy at the thought.

"Not selfish, you just wish Mum never has to go through one of these games. But Mum is not stupid she knows that she has a Better chance of surviving than Aunt Prim. She also would never forgive herself if she watched her own sister die in these games. I think she'd prefer that she die than Prim," Rose explained but a part of he wishes that Mum Doesn't say anything and let Prim get chosen.

**"Prim!" The strangled cry comes out of my throat, and my muscles begin to move again. "Prim!" I don't need to shove through the crowd. The other kids make way immediately, allowing me a straight path to the stage. I reach her just as she is about to mount the steps. With one sweep of my arm, I push her behind me.**

**"I volunteer!" I gasp. "I volunteer as tribute!"**

At this point most of the children are crying, Sophie grabs the box of tissues from the side and passes them to the group. Ryan doesn't take any tissues but Rose notices him sneakily wiping a tear away with his sleeve.

"Damn allergies," he mutters, when he notices Rose watching him, immediately dropping his arm.

"That's so brave, taking her sisters place, even though it's as good as a death sentence," Sophie sobs out when she pulls herself together.

"For other people yes but for Mum it isn't. She knows how to hunt, how to survive, she'll be fine," says Rose, needing this assurance to get her through the rest of the book.

"Animals yes, humans are a very different story," Finn pointed out.

**There's some confusion on the stage. District 12 hasn't had a volunteer for decades and the protocol has become rusty.**

"That doesn't make sense in the past people with older brothers or sisters must have been reaped, you would have thought that they would volunteer. I know that I could never watch a sibling of mine being sent off to be killed and I could do something about it, I couldn't live with myself," Matthew said disgusted.

"Other people aren't as brave as Aunt Katniss, they aren't a willing to die for other people," Finn defended them.

"Being reaped isn't necessarily a death sentence, they have a better chance than a twelve year old child would," Matthew carried on.

"With District 12's record it is, people probably don't have the skills that Aunt Katniss has," Finn answered again.

**The rule is that once a tribute's name has been pulled from the ball, another eligible boy, if a boy's name has been read, or a girl , if a girl's name been read, can step forward to take his or her place. In some districts, in which winning is such a great honour, people are eager to risk their lives and the volunteering is complicated.**

"How can people think that killing a load of children is a great honour?" Finn asked shocked

**But in District 12, where the word tribute is pretty synonymous with the word corpse, volunteers are all but extinct.**

"Cowards," muttered Ryan.

**"Lovely!" says Effie Trinket. "But I believe there's a small matter of introducing the reaping winner and then asking for volunteers, and if one does come forth then we um..." She trails off unsure herself.**

"Why the hell does that matter?" fumed Matthew.

**"What does it matter?" says the mayor. He's looking at me with a pained expression on his face. He doesn't know me really, but there's a faint recognition there. I am the girl who brings the strawberries. The girl his daughter might have spoken of on occasion. The girl who five years ago stood huddled with her mother and sister, as he presented her, the oldest child, with a medal of valour. A medal for her father, vaporized in the mines. Does he remember that?**

"I'm sure he remembers that, that's a lot to forget," muttered Matthew.

"Mum's hard to forget anyway," Rose says.

**"What does it matter?" He repeats briefly. "Let her come forward."**

**Prim is screaming hysterically behind me. She's wrapped her skinny arms around me like a vice. "No, Katniss! No! You can't go!"**

Sophie grabs for another tissue and so does Rose.

"Shouldn't she be happy that she no longer has to go?" asked Ryan.

"Not at the risk of her only sister. Of course she's not happy," snapped Sophie.

**"Prim, Let me go," I say harshly, because this is upsetting me and I don't want to cry. When they televise the replay of the readings tonight, everyone will take note of my tears, and I'll be marked as an easy target. A weakling. I will give no one that satisfaction. **

"Don't show anyone your weakness," stated Finn knowingly. "It's all a game; you have to play along to win."

**"Let go!"**

**I can feel someone pulling her from my back. I turn to see Gale has lifted Prim off the ground and she's thrashing in his arms. "Up you go Catnip," he says, in a voice he's fighting to keep steady, and then he carries Prim off towards my mother.**

"No! What are you doing? Don't let her go up there, volunteer instead of her I don't care just don't let her do this," screamed Matthew with tears in his eyes. To everyone's surprise he was the most level headed one of the group.

"Boys can't volunteer in the place of a girl," Finn reminded him but Matthew was beyond caring.

"Maybe Gale, will volunteer to take the boys place to protect Katniss," said Sophie.

"No he won't. That would be the last thing Mum would want. She'd want him to stay and protect her family," says Rose knowingly.

**I steel myself and climb the steps.**

**"Well, bravo!" gushes Effie Trinket. "That's the spirit of the games!" She's pleased to finally have a district with a little action going on it. "What's your name?"**

**I swallow hard. "Katniss Everdeen," I say.**

**"I bet my buttons that was your sister. Don't want her to steal all the glory, do we?**

"Yeah, because that's the real reason that she wanted to volunteer, didn't want her sister to have all the fun. Nothing to do with the fact that she wanted to save her sister from certain death," Rose said sarcastically.

**"Come on everybody! Let's give a big round of applause to our newest tribute!" trills Effie Trinket.**

"Why would you applause such a horrible thing?" asked Sophie outraged.

"Maybe for Aunt Katniss' bravery," Finn suggested.

**To the everlasting credit of the people of District 12, not one person claps. Not even the ones holding betting slips, the ones who are usually beyond caring.**

"They know that this is wrong and it certainly isn't something to applaud," Matthew said and everyone nodded in agreement.

**Possibly because they know me from the hob, or knew my father, or have encountered Prim, whom no one can help loving. So instead of acknowledging applause, I stand there unmoving while they take part in the boldest form of dissent they can manage. Silence. Which says we do not agree. We do not condone. All this is wrong.**

**Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me. But a shift has occurred since I stepped up to take Prim's place, and now it seems I have become someone precious. At first one, then another, then almost every member touches the three middle fingers of their left hand to their lips and holds it up to me.**

"Wow," both Matthew and Rose whisper. They didn't say anything else in the group who didn't have a clue what that sign meant.

"Ok, are you going to tell us what that means or do we guess?" Ryan asked impatiently.

"It's the ultimate sign of respect in our District. It's to show love and admiration, it's not used often but when it is used, it's an honour," Matthew explained.

**It is an old and rarely used gesture of our district, occasionally seen in funerals. It means thanks, it means admiration, it means goodbye to someone you love.**

"I think that gesture says volumes of what District 12 thinks of Aunt Katniss," says Finn also honoured that people were so moved by his Aunt's actions to do that gesture for her.

"Yeah," Matthew said with a sad smile on his face.

**Now I am truly in danger of crying, but fortunately Haymitch chooses this time to come staggering across the stage to congratulate me. "Look at her. Look at this one!" he hollers, throwing an arm around my shoulders. He's surprisingly strong for such a wreck. "I like her!"**

"Haymitch actually likes someone," Ryan says in mock horror.

"I'm sure he does like her, even now, though he'd never admit it to anyone," says Rose.

"He's drunk, he doesn't know what he's saying," explained Matthew.

**His breath reeks of liquor and it's been a long time since he's bathed.**

"Ew, that's disgusting, I would never let him touch me," shrilled Sophie shuddering.

"He may smell like alcohol, but Haymitch usually does shower," commented Rose.

"I know he gets drunk, but he's usually not this bad either," added Matthew.

"**Lots of…" He can't think of the word for a while. "Spunk!" he says triumphantly.**

"That's one word to describe Aunt Katniss I guess," says Ryan.

"He usually goes with the word arrogant," Rose says.

"Or mean," Finn carries on.

"Or bossy," Matthew added.

"**More than you!" He releases me and starts for the front of the stage. "More than you!" he shouts pointing directly at the camera.**

"Oh shit! That's not a good idea," says Matthew.

"He's taunting the Capitol," Finn said shocked.

"Maybe they'll ignore it because he's drunk," suggested Sophie.

"I don't think so. I don't know much about the capitol but I'm guessing that they don't like being made a fool of," says Finn.

**Is he addressing the audience or is he so drunk he might actually be taunting the Capitol?**

"I think it's a little bit of both," says Ryan.

"For his sake, I hope he was talking about the audience," Matthew said.

"The audience won't like that either," Sophie pointed out.

"I'd be more worried though about what the Capitol will do than the audience. The Capitol has the power to make his life a living hell," says Matthew.

**I'll never know because he's opening his mouth to continue, Haymitch plummets off the stage and knocks himself unconscious.**

Despite the tense situation everyone in the room laughs. Leave it to Haymitch to lighten such a horrible mood.

**He's disgusting, but I'm grateful. With every camera gleefully trained on him, I have just enough time to release the small, choked sound in my throat and compose myself. I put my hands behind my back and stare into the distance. I can see the hills I climbed this morning with Gale. For a moment, I yearn for something… the idea of us leaving the District… making our way in the woods...**

"Thinking of being all alone with Gale are we," Sophie says.

"Shut up Sophie," says Rose annoyed.

**But I know I was right about not running off. Because who else would have volunteered for Prim?**

"That's a horrible thought, that no one would have volunteered to save a young girl from death," says Matthew.

"Volunteering to save your sister is unbelievably brave. No one would want to sacrifice themselves for a girl they have no connection with, never mind how much they liked her," explained Finn. Even though it was a horrible thought it was still reality, people don't sacrifice themselves for the sake of another child their not even related to.

**Haymitch is whisked away on a stretcher,**

"Haymitch definitely knows how to make an exit," says Ryan trying to lighten the mood again to know prevail, everyone is as moody as they were before.

**And Effie Trinket is trying to get the ball rolling again. "What an exciting day!" she warbles as she attempts to straighten her wig, which has listed severely to the right. "But more excitement to come! It's time to choose our boy tribute!"**

Everyone in the room takes a deep breath waiting for the boy's name is read out, the boy who is destined to die later on in the book.

**Clearly hoping to contain her tenuous hair situation, she plants one hand on her head as she crosses to the bowl that contains the boys' names and grabs the first slip she encounters. She zips back to the podium, and I don't even have time to wish for Gale's safety when she's reading out the name.**

Finn stops reading immediately, making sure he read the name right. It couldn't be, he thought, what are the chances; he knew he couldn't show this to Rose or Matthew. He abruptly closes the book. "I'm bored, let's go fishing or hunting," he announces avoiding Rose's questioning looks.

"What? No, I want to finish the book," Ryan says grabbing the book off Finn but quickly putting it back down after reading the name Finn refused to say. "Actually fishing sounds great, we can make a fish dinner for when our parents come home."

"Since when do you like fishing?" asks Sophie suspiciously. Ryan gives her a pleading look to let the matter drop. Sophie didn't question anymore but wondering what was so bad about that name that was called.

"What name was it Finn?" Rose asks seeing straight through Finn and Ryan's distracting measures.

"Some guy called Trevor Barnett," answers Finn straight away pulling a name out of thin air. "Do you know a Trevor Barnett? Because I don't," Finn says laughing nervously. Rose dived for the book but Finn was too quick this time, holding the book out of reach.

"Just tell us Finn, it can't be that bad," pleads Rose. Finn looks at Ryan for help who shrugs.

"We have to tell them," Ryan says simply. Finn sighed and opened the book and reluctantly carried on reading.

"**Peeta Mellark." **

"No!" Rose screams absolutely devastated. This was the reaction that Finn was hoping to avoid; he hated to hear Rose in such pain. Matthew doesn't say anything, but he looks like he's also struggling to keep it together, he was shaking and silent tears were falling down his face. No one says another word, just trying to process this new information.

"Rose, we don't know if this book is real or not yet," Finn says trying to calm her down but this last name proves that the book was real.

"Wake up Finn the books are real. Look at all the names of people we know, my Mum, her sister, Uncle Haymitch, Effie Trinket and now my Dad. This is not a coincidence, these events must have happened," shouted Rose.

"How did they both survive?" Sophie asks softly.

"What do you mean?" replies Finn.

"Well it says that only one person can win, but we know that both Katniss and Peeta are alive. What happened for them both to survive?" Sophie answered. Everyone thought for a while but no one could think of an answer.

**Peeta Mellark?**

**Oh no, I think. Not him. Because I recognise this name, although I have never spoken directly to its owner. Peeta Mellark.**

"Wait a second how does she know about Uncle Peeta if they've never spoken before?" asked Ryan.

"Probably school," Sophie suggested.

"No her reaction wouldn't have been so upset if it was someone random person from her school," says Finn.

**No, the odds are not in my favour today.**

**I watch him as he makes his way towards the stage. Medium height, stocky build, ashy blond hair that falls in waves over his forehead. The shock of the moment is registering on his face, you can see his struggle to remain emotionless, but his blue eyes show the alarm I've seen so often in prey.**

"I don't Mum, comparing Dad to her prey," moaned Matthew.

**Yet he climbs steadily on to the stage and takes his place.**

**Effie Trinket asks for volunteers, but no one steps forward. He has two older brothers, I know, I've seen them in the bakery, but one is probably too old now to volunteer and the other won't.**

"Why won't he volunteer to take Dad's place?" cries Rose.

"Uncle Peeta may have told him not to volunteer if he ever gets reaped," suggested Finn.

**This is standard. Family devotion only goes so far for most people on reaping day. What I did was the radical thing.**

"No it shouldn't be like that, you protect your younger siblings always, never mind the consequences," Rose complained.

"Volunteering to die in someone's place is a little different though, not many people are willing to do that," says Finn.

"Mum did," Rose argued.

**The mayor begins to read the long, dull treaty of Treason as he does every year at this point – it's required – but I'm not listening to a word.**

**Why him? I think.**

"That's what I'm thinking," mumbled Matthew.

**Then I try to convince myself it doesn't matter. Peeta Mellark and I are not friends. Not even neighbours. We don't speak. Our only real interaction happened years ago. He's probably forgotten it. But I haven't and I know I never will…**

"What happened?" Ryan wondered.

"If you'd shut up we'll find out," said Sophie.

"Must be something big, if it's something she'll never forget," said Finn.

**It was during the worst time. My father had been killed in the mine accident three months earlier in the bitterest January anyone could remember. The numbness of his loss had passed, and the pain would hit me out of nowhere, doubling me over, racking my body with sobs.**

"Reminds me how my Mum is when she thinks about my Dad," says Finn.

**Where are you? I would cry out in my mind. Where have you gone? Of course, there was never any answer.**

**The district had given us a small amount of money as compensation for his death, enough to cover one month of grieving, after which my mother would be expected to get a job. Only she didn't. She didn't do anything but sit propped up in a chair or, more often, huddled under the blankets on her bed, some point in the distance.**

Finn stopped reading for a second, as the description of Katniss' Mum's grief, hit home with how his own Mum's episodes were like. It was hard to read, as much as it was hard to live through. Rose put her arm around Finn.

"I can read if you want," Rose suggested but Finn shook his head and carried on reading.

**Once in a while, she'd stir; get up as if moved by some urgent purpose, only to then collapse back into stillness. No amount of pleading from Prim seemed to affect her.**

This was where; Finn's Mum differed from Katniss' Mum though, when Annie had one of her episodes, it was usually Finn and only Finn that could get through to her.

**I was terrified. I suppose now that my mother was locked in some dark world of sadness, but at the time, all I knew was that I had not only lost a father, but a mother as well. At eleven years old, with Prim just seven, I took over as head of the family.**

"Eleven years old, she was just a child herself, she shouldn't of have to carry that burden on her own," Ryan said sadness tinged in her voice.

"She had no choice, with her Mum unable to look after the family it was fallen upon Aunt Katniss to look after their family," Finn said. She had it a lot worse than he did. His Mother's episodes would only last a couple of days but she always came through them, she would always make sure that was looked after and fed properly. When she wasn't up to the responsibility, friends and family would always help; he always had Rose and Matthew's house or Ryan's house to go to, to questions asked.

**There was no choice. I bought our food at the market and cooked it as best I could and tried to keep Prim and myself presentable. Because if it had become known that my mother could no longer care for us, the district would have taken us away from her and placed us in the community home. I'd grown up seeing those home kids at school. The sadness, the marks of angry hands on their faces, the hopelessness that curled their shoulders forward. I could never let that happen to Prim. Sweet tiny Prim who cried when I cried before she even knew the reason, who brushed and plaited my mother's hair before we left for school, who still polished my father's shaving mirror each night because he'd hated the layer of coal dust that settled on everything in the Seam. The community home would crush her like a bug.**

"Also, the reason why she took Prim's place in the hunger games, the Game's would destroy someone as sweet as Prim," says Finn, touched by his Aunts love for her sister.

**So I kept our predicament a secret. **

**But the money ran out and we were slowly starving to death. There's no other way to put it. I kept telling if I could only hold out until May, just the eighth of May, I would turn twelve and be able to sign up for the tesserae and get that precious grain and oil to feed us. Only there were still several weeks to go. We could well be dead by then.**

"These aren't what normal girls go through. We should be worrying about school, homework and which boys' like us, normal teenage stuff. Yet Mum, has to worry about how she going to feed her family each week and have to slowly watch her family waste away," Rose cried out.

"That's why we're lucky, our parents gave us what every child needs a normal childhood, away from this kind of thing," Finn carried on for Rose.

**Starvation's not an uncommon fate in District 12. Who hasn't seen the victim's? Older people who can't work. Children from a family with too many to feed. Those injured in the mines. Straggling through the streets. And one day, you come upon them sitting against a wall or lying in the meadow, you hear the wails from a house, and the peacekeepers are called in to retrieve the body.**

"I don't think I could sit back and watch a person starve to death, family member, friend or even a complete stranger, I would do everything in my power to help," says Sophie.

"That's the thing, most of the District were in the same situation, they didn't have enough money or food to help other people out, they probably do want to help but didn't have enough to share. The ones who do have enough, don't care enough to share," explains Matthew.

"You mean the one's with no souls," mumbles Ryan.

**Starvation is never the cause of the death officially. It's always the flu, or exposure, or Pneumonia. But that fools no one.**

"Typical Government for you, sweep the bad things under the rug and sugar coat the truth, don't let the world know what is really going on," says Ryan angrily.

"Why bother covering up the truth? I'm sure the District knows what's going on and the other Districts for that matter," asks Sophie.

"Probably for the sake of the richer District's and the Capitol, no one could sit by and let the Government treat human beings like this, it would cause a rebellion. As the saying goes, what you don't know can't hurt you," explains Finn.

**On the afternoon of my encounter with Peeta Mellark, the rain was falling in relentless icy sheets. I had been in town, trying to trade some threadbare old baby clothes of Prim's in the public Market, but there were no takers. Although I had been to the Hob or several occasions with my Father, I was too frightened to venture into the rough, gritty place alone. The rain had soaked Father's hunting Jacket, leaving me chilled to the bone. For three days, we'd had nothing but boiled water withhold dried up mint leaves I'd found in the back of the cupboard.**

"That's not enough to sustain anyone," says Finn.

"Things were really bad," Rose agreed.

**By the time the market closed, I was shaking so hard I dropped my bundle of baby clothes in a muddy puddle. I didn't pick it up for fear I would keel over and be unable to regain my feet. Besides, no one wanted those clothes.**

Both Sophie and Rose cried out in sadness at the description at how close Katniss really was to death.

"Why isn't anyone helping her?" Sophie cried.

"I think someone is going to," says Finn.

"I can't believe no would give her anything for those clothes. If I saw a young girl in that condition I would feel compelled to help her, even if what she was offering me was crap," Ryan says, annoyed at people's ignorance. Finn opened his mouth to explain but Ryan shut him up. "I know people probably didn't have much to give but even something small is better than nothing."

**I couldn't go home. Because at home was my mother with her dead eyes and my little sister, with her hollow cheeks and cracked lips. I couldn't walk into that room with the smoky fire from the damp branches I had scavenged at the edge of the woods after the coal had run out, my hands empty of any hope.**

**I found myself stumbling along a muddy lane behind the shops that serve the wealthiest townspeople. The Merchants live above their businesses, so I was essentially in their back gardens. I remember the outlines of garden beds not yet planted for the spring, a goat or two in a pen, one sodden dog tied to a post, hunched defeated in the muck.**

**All forms of stealing are forbidden in District 12. Punishable by death.**

"Wow, that's harsh," says Ryan.

"But not surprising, with a strictly government like the Capitol," Finn adds on.

"A rule plenty of people broke as well out of pure desperation," says Matthew.

"But death really, I mean who hasn't stolen some sweets or something when they were little," Ryan prattles on but stops when he realises no one agrees with him about stealing something when they were little. "Am I the only one?" Instead of answering Finn carried on reading.

**But it crossed my mind that there might be something in the rubbish bins, and those were fair game. Perhaps a bone at the butcher's or rotted vegetables at the grocer's, something no one but my family was desperate enough to eat.**

"Disgusting," exclaimed Sophie.

"Desperate times calls for desperate measures," Finn said nonchalantly.

**Unfortunately, the bins had just been emptied.**

**When I pass the baker's, the smell of fresh bread was so overwhelming I felt dizzy.**

"I agree, nothing smells better than freshly baked bread," says Matthew smiling regardless of the situation but the smile was short lived.

"When your starving, everything smells amazing," says Rose but she also loves the smell of her Dad's homemade bread.

**The ovens were in the back, and a golden glow spilled out of the open kitchen door. I stood mesmerized by the heat and the luscious scent until the rain interfered, running its icy fingers down my back, forcing me back to life. I lifted the lid to the baker's bin and found it spotlessly, heartlessly bare.**

**Suddenly a voice was screaming at me and I looked up to see the baker's wife, telling me to move on and did I want her to call the peacekeepers and how sick she was of having those brats from the Seam pawing through her rubbish.**

"Evil bitch! Can't she see that the girl is desperate?" Ryan complained.

"I think that's our grandmother," says Matthew.

"I mean what a charming woman she must be," Ryan quickly back tracked not wanting to offend Rose or Matthew. "Oh fuck it, sorry but she's a bitch."

"No your right she's a bitch," Rose agrees plainly causing everyone to laugh.

**The words were ugly and I had no defence. As I carefully replaced the lid and backed away, I noticed him, a blond boy with blond hair peering out from behind his mother's back.**

"Dad!" both Matthew and Rose exclaimed in delight.

**I'd seen him at school. He was in my year, but I didn't know his name. He stuck with the town kids, so how would I? His mother went back into the bakery, grumbling, but he must have been watching me as I made my way behind the pen that held their pig and leaned against the far side of an old apple tree. The realization that I'd have nothing to take home had finally sunk in. My knees buckled and I slid down the tree truck to its roots. It was too much. I was too sick and weak and tired, oh, so tired. Let them call the peacekeepers and take us to the community home, I thought. Or better yet, let me die right her in the rain.**

"No don't speak like that, carry on fighting, Dad help her," cried Rose.

"I think he will do," says Finn.

**There was a clatter in the bakery and I heard the woman screaming again and the sound of a blow, and I vaguely wondered what was going on. Feet sloshed towards me through the mud and I thought. It's her. She's coming to drive me away with a stock. But it wasn't her. It was the boy. In his arms, he carried two large loaves of bread that must have fallen into the fire because the crusts were scorched black.**

"Did he burn the bread for her?" asked Rose shocked.

"I think he did," answered Matthew.

**His mother was yelling, "Feed it to the pig, you stupid creature! Why not? No one decent will buy burned bread!"**

"Didn't it cross her mind as well, to give the bread to the starving girl outside," ranted Finn.

"No because she's a bitch," shouted Sophie shouted. Everyone didn't say anything just stared at Sophie in surprise. "Sorry, but she is." Everyone was stunned because it wasn't like her to say anything nasty about another person.

**He began to tear off chunks from the burned parts and toss them to the trough, and the front bakery bell rung and the mother disappeared to help a customer.**

**The boy never even glanced my way, but I was watching him. Because of the bread, because of the red weal that stood out on his cheekbone.**

"She hit him, just because he burned a bit of bread," says Rose shocked. Her parents would never hit her; she couldn't imagine anyone hitting their own child.

**What had she hit him with? My parents never hit us. I couldn't even imagine it.**

"Neither can I, I know it happens but I still don't understand it, purposely doing something to hurt your own child its sick," complained Finn.

"For all the things that are happening in this book, I actually think that a parent hitting their child is probably the least shocking of them all," says Ryan.

**The boy took one look back at the bakery as if checking that the coast was clear, then, his attention back on the pig, he threw a loaf of bread in my direction. The second quickly followed, and he sloshed back to the bakery, closing the kitchen door tightly behind him.**

All the children were smiling at this, at how sweet Peeta was even back then to Katniss.

"That is so sweet," said Sophie.

"So romantic," says Rose.

"Romantic, he only threw her some bread, anyone would have done it," scoffed Ryan but instantly regretting it, from the looks the girls were giving him.

"He saved her life," retorted Sophie.

"And you've read how desperate she was, not just anyone would have done it," argued Rose.

"Not many people would have it for a complete stranger," agreed Finn.

**I stared at the loaves in disbelief. They were fine, perfect really, except for the burned areas. Did he mean for me to have them?**

"Don't question it, just take it and run," says Ryan.

"She doesn't want to steal food that doesn't belong to her," replies Matthew.

"He threw it at her, it's obvious it was meant for her," says Ryan.

"Mum is not used to people being so charitable," says Matthew sadly.

**He must have. Because they were at my feet. Before anyone could witness what had happened I shoved the loaves under my shirt wrapped the hunting jacket tightly about me, and walked swiftly away. The heat of the bread burned into my skin, but I clutched it tighter, clinging to life.**

"Uncle Peeta, obviously burnt the bread on purpose knowing his Mum won't serve it and force him to give it to the pigs, giving him time to give it to Katniss and save his life," Finn sums it up for the other children.

"It really was brave, knowing how his mother would react," says Matthew. He loved to hear how selfless Father is, as a lot of people said that he was a lot like his father.

**By the time I reached home, the loaves had cooled somewhat, but the insides were still warm. When I dropped them on the table, Prim's hands reached to tear of a chunk, but I make her sit, forced my mother to join us at the table and poured warm tea. I scraped off the black stuff and sliced the bread. We ate an entire loaf, slice by slice. It was good hearty bread, filled with raisins and nuts.**

"Dad still makes that for Mum even now," says Matthew smiling fondly, now knowing the significance that bread was to the two of them.

**I put my clothes to dry at the fire, crawled into bed, and fell into a dreamless sleep. It didn't occur to me until the next morning that the boy might have burned the bread on purpose.**

"Of course he did, he didn't want to see you suffer," says Rose.

**Might have dropped the loaves into the flames, knowing it meant being punished, and then delivered them to me. But I dismissed this. It must have been an accident. Why would he have done it? He didn't even know me.**

"He was being kind, that's the kind of thing that Dad would have done," explained Matthew.

"We know that, but Mum doesn't, she isn't used to people being kind for no reason," says Rose.

**Still, just throwing me the bread was an enormous kindness that would have surely resulted in a beating, if discovered. I couldn't explain his actions.**

"Shocker, a person doesn't like to see another person starve to death, so he gives her some food to help her out," says Ryan.

"It's horrible to think, that such a kind act was unheard of back then," says Finn.

**We ate slices of bread for breakfast and headed to school. It was as if spring had come overnight. Warm sweet air. Fluffy clouds. At school, I passed the boy in the hall; his cheek had swelled up and his eye had blackened.**

"What kind of mother would treat their own son like that?" asked Sophie angrily. No one could give her an answer though.

**He was with his friends and didn't acknowledge me in any way. But as I collected Prim and started for home that afternoon, I found him staring at me from across the school yard.**

"So he obviously noticed her in school," says Sophie.

"Probably wasn't the only time if noticed her either, if he was willing to do something like that for her," adds Rose.

**Our eyes met for only a second, then he turned his head away. I dropped my gaze, embarrassed, and that's when I saw it. The first dandelion of the year. A bell went off in my head. I thought of the hours spent in the woods with my father and I knew how we were going to survive.**

"How does a dandelion have anything to do with hunting in the woods?" wondered Ryan.

"Probably, because flowers grow in the woods," says Finn shrugging not sure himself.

**To this day, I can never shake the connection between this boy, Peeta Mellark, and the bread that gave me hope, and the dandelion that reminded me that I was not doomed. And more than once, I have turned in the school hallway and caught his eyes trained on me, only to quickly flit away.**

"Looks like Gale isn't the only one with a little crush," observed Sophie.

"I wonder if Dad did have a crush on Mum when he was younger and that's why he gave her the bread," mused Rose but Matthew just shrugged in response.

**Maybe if I thanked him at some point, I'd be feeling less conflicted now.**

"I don't think so, an act of kindness like that doesn't go away with just a thank you," says Matthew.

**I thought about it a couple of times, but the opportunity never seemed to present itself. And now it never will. Because we're going to be thrown into an arena to fight to the death. Exactly how am I supposed to work in a thank-you in there?**

"Easy, right before you kill him, you say by the way thanks for the bread but now I have to kill you," says Ryan wryly. But no one laughed at his joke. "What I was joking?"

"It's not funny," Rose replied not amused at all.

**Somehow it just won't seem sincere if I'm trying to slit his throat.**

"Your Mum made a joke about it," Ryan pointed out but no one listened to him.

**The mayor finishes the dreary treaty of treason and motions for Peeta and me to shake hands. His are as solid and warm as those loaves of bread. Peeta looks me right in the eye and gives my hand what I think is meant to be a reassuring squeeze. Maybe it's just a nervous spasm.**

"I wonder what that means," says Sophie.

"Maybe it means nothing, just a friendly gesture," suggested Rose.

**We turn back to face the crowd as the anthem of Panem plays.**

**Oh, well, I think. There are twenty four of us. Odds are someone else will kill him before I do.**

"What a reassuring thought that is," says Rose sarcastically.

"It probably was to Aunt Katniss, she doesn't want to be the one to kill him," answers Finn.

**Of course, the odds have not been very dependable of late.**

"That's the end of the chapter," says Finn putting the book down waiting for the next person to pick up the book. No one does, all of them deep in thought again.

"Why didn't Mum or Dad ever tell us about the story with the bread?" asked Rose breaking the silence. "It's a beautiful story to tell your children, a bit of background information about their relationship."

"Yes it is, but it would have brought up a lot of questions on why the bread was so significant to Aunt Katniss and why she was starving in the first time. They probably didn't know how to answer them questions," defended Finn. But he also knows how Rose feels; he loved to hear stories about his parents but his Mother didn't tell him much to his frustration.

"I guess, but I would have liked to hear about it regardless," complains Rose.

"I know," agrees Finn simply.

**Author Notes: Only one week until catching Fire comes out, I can't wait. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Well that was intense," Ryan says after a few minutes of silence. Everyone just nods in agreement. "Please say that it gets better."

"I doubt it, it will probably get worse, we're only two chapters in, we haven't even started the games yet," says Finn.

"Remind me why we are reading these depressing books again?" asked Ryan.

"For answers," answers Rose simply.

"Whose turn is it to read?" asks Finn waving the book in front of everyone.

"I'll read," says Sophie grabbing the book of him.

**The moment the anthem ends, we are taken into custody.**

"Sounds like they're going to jail," says Ryan.

"I think they'd prefer jail," says Matthew bitterly.

**I don't mean we're handcuffed or anything, but a group of peacekeepers marches us through the front door of the Justice Building. Maybe tributes have tried to escape in the past.**

"I know I would," said Ryan.

"You wouldn't get very far though, they'd catch you before you even reach the outskirts of the District," explains Finn.

**I've never seen that happen though.**

**Once inside, I'm conducted to a room and left alone. It's the richest place I've ever been in, with thick, deep carpets and a velvet couch and chairs. I know velvet because my mother has a dress with a collar made of the stuff. When I sit on the couch, I can't help running my fingers over the fabric repeatedly. It helps to calm me as I try and prepare for the next hour.**

"I don't think anything could calm me down, at a time like that," muttered Rose.

"I don't know, fingering furniture helps me calm down," says Finn trying to crack a joke to make Rose smile to no luck.

**The time allotted for the tributes to say goodbye to their loved ones.**

"My god, what the hell do you say to your family at a time like that?" asks Sophie.

"Don't touch my stuff, remember to feed the cat and water the flowers," offered Ryan. "If the cat dies, I will come back and haunt you personally." No one laughed at Ryan's joke but Rose hit him over the head. "What Finn gets to make stupid jokes?"

"You have to pick your moments mate," says Finn.

**I cannot afford to get upset, to leave this room with puffy eyes and a red nose. Crying is not an option. There will be more cameras at the train station.**

"Don't want to look ugly in front of the camera," says Ryan.

"More like not showing people that you are weak and emotional. It will say that she is an easy target," explains Rose.

**My sister and my mother come first. I reach out to Prim and she climbs on my lap, her arms around my neck, head on my shoulder, just like she did when she was a toddler. **

"It seems like the way a child embraces their mother," says Sophie.

"I think Aunt Katniss' relationship with her sister was more like mother and Daughter than siblings," said Finn.

"Mum had to take over both her parent's role in the family, you can tell by how close the two of them are," Matthew carries on.

**My mother sits beside me and wraps her arms around us. For a few minutes, we say nothing. **

"Like I said, there is nothing to be said in a moment like that, you just have to be there for each other," says Sophie.

**Then I start telling them all the things they must remember to do, now that I will not be there to do them for them.**

"She's only going away for a few weeks," complains Rose.

"She doesn't know that, as far as she knows she won't be coming back," explains Finn but Rose didn't care.

**Prim is not to take any tesserae.**

"Well that's a given," says Matthew.

"Not really, if the family are starving, Prim will definitely take a tesserae," says Ryan.

"But then it would be pointless for Mum's sacrifice, if Prim is willing to throw it away," argues Rose.

**They can get by, if they're careful, on selling Prim's goat's milk and cheese and the small apothecary business my mother now runs for the people in the Seam. Gale will get her the herbs she doesn't grow herself, but she must be very careful to describe them because he's not as familiar with them as I am. He'll also bring them game**

"Shouldn't she ask Gale before making these presumptions?" says Ryan.

"Gale will do it, if they are best friends she wouldn't have to ask," says Rose.

**He and I made a pact about this a year or so ago – and will probably not ask for compensation, but they should thank him with some kind of trade, like milk or medicine.**

**I don't bother suggesting Prim learns to hunt.**

"Why not it's such a useful skill to have?" complains Rose, who thinks everyone should learn how to hunt.

"I don't think that hunting is for someone like Prim, she wouldn't want to hurt anyone even an animal," explains Finn.

**I tried to teach her a couple of times and it was disastrous.**

"Sounds like me trying to teach you," Rose says to Finn who wasn't impressed with her accusation.

"I wasn't that bad," says Finn.

"You hit yourself in the face with the arrow," argues Rose. Ryan burst out laughing as Finn went bright red.

"That was one time, let it go," shouts Finn as Rose mouths and signs ten to the others behind Finn's back. Matthew and Sophie laugh as well at this. "It's a really hard weapon to learn."

"Sure it is," sniggers Ryan.

**The woods terrified her, and whenever I shot something, she'd get all teary and talk about how we might be able to heal it if we got it home soon enough.**

"See Prim, is too gentle of a person for hunting," says Finn.

"Are you saying that I'm not a gentle person?" demands Rose.

"Pretty much," answers Finn straight away.

**But she does well with her goat, so I concentrate on that.**

**When I am done with instructions about fuel, and staying in school, I turn to my mother and grip her arm, hard. "Listen to me. Are you listening to me?" She nods, alarmed by my intensity. She must know what's coming. "You can't leave again," I say.**

"Of course she can't, Prim will need her mother more than ever now," says Rose.

**My mother's eyes find the floor. "I know. I won't. I couldn't help what-"**

"**Well you have to help it this time. You can't clock out and leave Prim on her own. There's no me now to keep you both alive. It doesn't matter what happens. Whatever you see on the screen. You have to promise me you'll fight through it!"**

"She will finally have to act like the parent again. She was lucky before because Mum was smart and strong enough to look after her and her family alone. But Prim isn't she'll need her Mother to stay sane, while her sister is away," says Matthew.

**My voice has risen to a shout. In it is all the anger, all the fear I felt at her abandonment.**

"I bet that had been bubbling up inside her for a while," says Ryan.

"It needed to be said," agrees Finn.

**She pulls her arm from my grasp, moved to anger herself now. "I was ill. I could have treated myself if I'd had the medicine I have now."**

"Excuses," mutters Rose. Just like her mother she couldn't forgive people that easily.

**That part about her being ill might be true. I've seen her bring back people from immobilizing sadness since. Perhaps it is a sickness, but it's one we can't afford.**

"It is a sickness, people can't help it when their ill," defends Finn for his mother.

"**Then take it. And take care of her!" I say.**

"**I'll be alright, Katniss," says Prim, clasping my face in her hands. "But you have to take care, too. You're so fast and brave. Maybe you can win."**

"Damn straight," agrees Rose.

**I can't win. Prim must know that in her heart. The competition will be far beyond my abilities, Kids from wealthier districts, where winning is a huge honour, who've trained their whole lives for this.**

"Wait a second people train for these games their whole lives that's sick," Finn says.

"Makes sense though, you train to make that your district have the best chance to win," explains Matthew.

"But unfair on the other Districts though isn't it," Ryan points out.

"I don't think the Capitol cares about things being fair, they want a good show," says Matthew.

**Boys who are two or three times my size. Girls who knows twenty different ways to kill you with a knife.**

"When she puts it like that, how the hell does your mother win?" asks Ryan.

"Shut up Ryan, Mum is best bar none," mumbles Rose.

**Oh there'll be people like me, too. A person to weed out before the real fun begins.**

"Sounds like she's already given up before she even goes into the games," says Sophie.

"She better not give up she has to win," cries Rose.

"We know that but she doesn't. From Aunt Katniss' position things probably don't look that promising," says Finn.

"**Maybe," I say.**

"Definitely," corrects Rose.

**Because I can hardly tell my mother to carry on if I've already given up myself. Besides, it isn't in my nature to go down without a fight, even when things seem insurmountable. "Then we'll be as rich as Haymitch."**

"**I don't care if we're rich. I just want you to come home. You will try, won't you? Really, really try?" asks Prim.**

"Of course she'll try, she'll try and she'll win," said Rose.

"I'm sure she'll try now that her little sister has demanded her to win," says Finn.

"**Really, really try. I swear it," I say. And I know because of Prim, I'll have to.**

"And she will try Mum is not one to go back on her promises, especially to the one's she loves," says Matthew.

**And then the Peacekeeper is at the door, signalling our time is up and we're all hugging one another so hard it hurts and all I'm saying is, "I love you. I love you both." And they're saying it back and the then the Peacekeeper orders them out and the door closes.**

"I hate them Peacekeepers, what difference would a couple of seconds make, they might not see each other again," shouts Sophie.

"Don't say that," moans Rose.

"Well I highly doubt that these Peacekeepers feel any compassion to those in the reaping or in the district," says Finn obviously annoyed as well.

"As I said they don't have a soul," says Ryan.

"Everyone has a soul," argues Sophie.

"Usually I agree with you on that, but anyone who could condone this kind of thing to happen, I highly doubt has a soul," says Matthew emotionless.

**I bury my head in one of the velvet pillows as if this can block the whole thing out.**

**Someone else enters the room, and when I look up, I'm surprised to see the baker, Peeta Mellark's father.**

"What is he doing there?" asks Ryan confused.

"Probably to say goodbye and wish her luck," says Sophie.

"She's about to enter a fight to the death, with his son, and he knows that only one of them will survive, I think people would understand if he wanted her to die," says Ryan, earning a glare from Rose and Matthew.

"He probably wants to tell her, that he doesn't hold it against her, whatever happens in the games, that they are not her fault," explains Finn.

**After all, I'll be trying to kill his son soon.**

"No you won't, that's your husband you're talking about," says Rose.

"Well not yet, they're not even friends at the moment," Finn interjects.

"I don't care, isn't there a rule that says that you can't kill your future husband or something," argues Rose.

"Well she doesn't know that, all she knows is that if she wants to win the games and return home to her family, she has to kill Peeta," defends Finn.

"I really hate your logic at the moment Finn," says Matthew quietly.

**But we do know each other a bit, and he knows Prim even better. When she sells her goat's cheeses at the hob, she puts two of them aside for him and he gives her a generous amount of bread in return. We always wait to trade with him when his witch of a wife isn't around because he's so much nicer.**

"See even Aunt Katniss calls her a witch," Ryan points out.

"Ryan we never said anything to you about calling her a bitch, we actually agreed with you," says Matthew.

**I feel certain he would never have hit his son the way she did over the burned bread.**

"No one who loves their son would hit them like she did," mumbles Sophie.

**But why has he come to see me?**

**The baker sits awkwardly on the edge of the plush chairs. He's a big, broad-shouldered man with burn scars from years at the ovens. He must have just said goodbye to his son.**

**He pulls a white package from his jacket pocket and holds it out to me. I open it and find cookies. These are a luxury we can never afford.**

"I couldn't imagine not being able to afford cookies," says Finn, they were one of his favourite treats.

"**Thank you," I say. The baker's not a very talkative man in the best of times and today he has no words at all. **

"And what is he supposed to say at that moment," asks Sophie.

"Well he probably did have something to say if he took the time to visit Mum, he's probably just finding the right words," says Matthew.

"**I had some of your bread this morning. My friend Gale gave you a squirrel for it." He nods, as if remembering the squirrel. "Not your best trade," I say. He shrugs as if it couldn't possibly matter.**

"Wow it would probably be easier getting a conversation from the wall," Ryan complained.

"Imagine how awkward it is for him at this moment," retorts Rose.

**Then I can't think of anything else, so we sit in silence until a Peacekeeper summons him. He rises and coughs to clear his throat. "I'll keep an eye on the little girl. Make sure she's eating."**

"That's probably all he wanted to say, so Aunt Katniss didn't have to worry about her little sister dying from starvation," says Finn.

"It's sweet, but why would he do that?" asks Ryan.

"Anyone would do it," argues Sophie.

"No they wouldn't Aunt Katniss' past show that. Their family obviously means more to him than he is letting on," Ryan argues back.

"Ryan's right, I think there's a history between their families that goes further back than Aunt Katniss and Uncle Peeta," Finn agreed. Everyone thought about that, they wondered what happened there.

**I feel some of the pressure in my chest lighten at his words. People deal with me, but they are genuinely fond of Prim. Maybe there will be enough fondness to keep her alive.**

"With Grandpa and Gale watching out for her, I'm sure Prim will be just fine," says Matthew.

**My next guest is also unexpected. Madge walks straight to me.**

"Why should Madge visiting her be a surprise, they are friends?" asks Sophie.

"Mum isn't sure if she classes her as a friend, so it probably was a surprise to her," explains Rose.

**She is not weepy or evasive. Instead there's an urgency about her tone that surprises me. "They let you wear one thing from your district in the arena. One thing to remind you of home. Will you wear this?" She holds out the circular gold pin that was on her dress earlier. I hadn't paid much attention to it before, but now I see it's a small bird in flight.**

"Is that what I think it is?" Rose asks Finn.

"I think it is," Finn agrees.

"What?" Ryan asks.

"We saw that pin, when we found the books in the house," explains Finn.

"**Your pin?" I say. Wearing a token from my district is about the last thing on my mind.**

"**Here I'll put it on your dress, all right?" Madge doesn't wait for an answer; she just leans in and fixes the bird to my dress. "Promise you'll wear it into the arena, Katniss?" she asks. "Promise?"**

"Kind of pushy isn't she," says Ryan.

"A bit too pushy, just for a pin, there must be something significant about that pin, which may come up later in the book," wondered Finn.

"Maybe she thinks that it will be a lucky charm for Katniss," offered Sophie. Finn shrugs in response, not buying that theory either.

"**Yes," I say. Cookies. A pin. I'm getting all kinds of gifts today. Madge gives me one more. A kiss on the cheek. Then she's gone and I'm left thinking that maybe Madge really has been my friend all along.**

"I think she has been," says Sophie.

"She does act like a friend around Mum," agrees Rose.

**Finally, Gale is here, and maybe there is nothing romantic between us, but when he opens his arms I don't hesitate to go into them.**

"Ugh," Rose complains, she hated hearing about her mother and another man.

"I think it's sweet," counters Sophie.

"Not so sweet, when it might be your Dad," Rose shoots back earning a glare from Sophie.

"He's not my Dad," shouts Sophie.

"Whatever," Rose muttered not wanting to get into it with Sophie.

**His body is familiar to me – the way he moves, the smell of wood smoke, even the sound of his heart beating I know from quiet moments on a hunt – but this is the first time I feel it, lean and hard muscled against my own.**

"Way too familiar for my liking," complained Rose again.

"Rose your Mum has a past like everyone else, you'll have to deal with it, she's with your Dad now so it doesn't matter anyway," says Finn.

"Would you like it, if you found out your Dad was with someone else but your Mother Finn," Rose argued back. Finn shut up, Rose was right he wouldn't like that at all.

"**Listen," he says. "Getting a knife should be pretty easy, but you've got to get your hands on a bow. That's your best chance."**

"No time for romance, straight to business, my kind of man," says Ryan.

"Of course he wants to give Mum all the advice he can, before it's too late," says Matthew.

"**They don't always have bows," I say, thinking of the year there were only horrible spiked maces that the tributes had to bludgeon one another to death with.**

"That's horrible," gasps Sophie.

"Sophie, you do realise what the rules to these games are, right?" asks Ryan.

"Or course I do, it's still horrible though," Sophie says.

"**Then make one," says Gale. "Even a weak bow is better than no bow at all."**

"She can make one, that easy," said Ryan sounding impressed.

"Of course she can, it won't be very good but it's still something," says Rose.

**I have tried copying my father's bows, with poor results. It's not that easy. Even he had to scrap his own work sometimes.**

"**I don't even know if there'll be wood," I say.**

"I think there will be some kind of source of wood, even the capitol would be that cruel," says Matthew.

"Oh they would be, but people will need wood to make a fire, people will die from the cold, the capitol would hate that, no action," explains Finn.

**Another year, they tossed everybody into a landscape of nothing but boulders and sand and scruffy bushes. I particularly hated that year. Many contestants were bitten by venomous snakes or went insane from thirst.**

"So the Capitol controls what will be inside the games and they change it every year, interesting," ponders Finn.

"**There's almost always some wood," Gale says. "Since that year half of them died of cold. Not much entertainment in that."**

"Oh poor them, the children didn't die in an entertaining way," says Sophie her voice dripping with venom.

**It's true. We spent one Hunger Games watching the players freeze to death at night.**

"I think I'd prefer that, than see a bunch of children kill each other," says Matthew.

"I wouldn't want to see anyone die," says Sophie.

**You could hardly see them because they were just huddled in balls and had no wood for fire or torches or anything.**

"Bastards," whispered Rose, crying for the children she never knew, the children she never knew the names of.

**It was considered very anticlimactic in the Capitol, all those quiet, bloodless deaths. Since then, there's usually been wood to make fires.**

"**Yes, there's usually some," I say.**

"**Katniss, it's just hunting. You're the best hunter I know," says Gale.**

"It's not just hunting, this is children they are talking about," complains Rose.

"But her hunting skills will come in handy, that's what he's probably trying to say," says Finn.

"**It's not just hunting. They're armed. They think," I say.**

"**So do you. And you've had more practice. Real practice," he says. "You know how to kill."**

"If it was only that easy," mutters Matthew.

"When he says it like that, it already makes her sound like a killer," says Rose.

"**Not people," I say.**

"**How different can it be, really?" says Gale grimly.**

"Very different, I imagine," answers Ryan.

**The awful thing is that if I forget they're people, it will be no different at all.**

"Don't think like that then," says Sophie.

"She won't Aunt Katniss is to compassionate to think like that," Finn reassures her.

**The peacekeepers are back too soon and Gale asks for more time, but they're taking him away and I start to panic. "Don't let them starve!" I cry out, clinging to his hand.**

"Of course he won't let them starve, it's pointless bringing it up," says Sophie.

"She has to make sure though, it will keep her mind at ease," says Matthew.

"Mind at ease, she's about to kill a load of children, I don't think her mind will be at ease," Ryan pointed out.

"Yeah, but she won't have to worry about her sister," replied Matthew.

"**I won't! You know I won'! Katniss, remember I," he says, and they yank us apart and slam the door and I'll never know what it was he wanted me to remember.**

"I think he wanted to tell her that he loved her," Sophie finished for Gale, Rose pretended to gag.

"If that was the case, I'm glad he never had the chance to finish his sentence," says Rose disgusted at the fact that someone other than her Father wanted to confess his love to her Mum.

**It's a short ride from the justice Building to the train station. I've never been in a car before.**

"Whose never been in a car before?" asked Ryan surprised.

"I doubt that a lot of people in District 12 could actually afford cars, so probably a lot of people," answered Finn.

**Rarely even ridden in wagons. In the Seam, we travel on foot.**

**I've been right not to cry. The station is swarmed with reporters with their insect like cameras trained directly on my face.**

"It's like their celebrities," said Sophie.

"I think the Tributes and especially the winners are celebrities in the capitol," says Finn.

"If that's what it takes to become famous, I definitely never want to be a celebrity," Ryan said.

**But I've had a lot of practice at wiping my face clean of emotions and I do this now. I catch a glimpse of myself on the television screen or the wall that's airing my arrival live and I feel gratified that I appear almost bored.**

"She must get a lot of practice in the games, she's a pro at it now," says Matthew, sniggering to himself.

"Unlike Dad, who seems to wear his heart in his sleeve," added Rose.

**Peeta Mellark, on the other hand, has obviously been crying, and interestingly enough, does not seem to be trying to cover it up.**

"That's Dad for you, he doesn't care if people see him cry, he's not embarrassed by it," says Matthew.

**I wonder immediately wonder if this will be his strategy in the games. To appear weak and frightened, to reassure other tributes that he is no competition at all, and then come out fighting.**

"I doubt he's acting, or even has a strategy in the games," says Rose.

"He should do, what about keeping himself alive?" asks Ryan.

"He probably doesn't think that he can win," answers Matthew.

"But he does," Ryan shoots back.

"He doesn't know that," retorts Matthew.

**This worked very well for a girl, from District 7 a few years back. She seemed like such a snivelling, cowardly fool that no one bothered about her until there were only a handful of contestants left. It turned out she could kill viciously. Pretty clever, the way she played it.**

Sophie attempted to carry on reading the paragraph, hoping that Ryan didn't notice how she clearly omitted the name of the girl but he noticed. "Wait a second what was the name of the girl who won," asked Ryan interested as it was about his district maybe he knew her.

"There wasn't one," answered Sophie but she stuttered it, clearly telling Ryan that she was lying.

"You're a terrible liar, Sophie Hawthorne; I don't see why you bother. Just tell me the name, I can handle it," pleaded Ryan, he was getting nervous for a name, it was obviously someone he knew if Sophie downright lied about it. Sophie avoided his eyes but didn't give him a name. "Just tell me Sophie," Ryan shouted now upset.

"I'm sorry Ryan," she whispered before reading the real sentence in the book. "This worked well for a girl, Johanna Mason, from district 7 a few years back. Everyone gasped at the name of Ryan's mother, everyone except Ryan that was, who just stared at the floor in silence, like words were escaping him. Five minutes later people waited for Ryan to speak but nothing happened,

"Ryan are you Ok?" asked Sophie finally. Ryan looked into Sophie's eyes but there were no tears, there appeared nothing in his expression he just nodded.

"Yes! It actually makes sense, why Mum is so angry and guarded all the time. I knew she was hiding something, granted I never would have thought it was something this big, but I'm glad I know," Ryan says quietly. Sophie didn't carry on reading until she got the go ahead from Ryan to carry on.

"I think it makes sense that Auntie Johanna was a winner of these games, we already knew she was a badass," says Finn trying to keep the conversation light. It worked as Ryan smiled at his joke.

"The one thing that does surprise me was her strategy, I never thought that Mum could act weak and frightened, I bet she hated doing that," Ryan carried on, laughing slightly. "You can carry on Sophie I'm ok honestly." Sophie hesitated but then nodded.

**But this seems an odd strategy for Peeta Mellark because he's a baker's son. All those years of having enough to eat and hauling bread trays around made him broad-shouldered and strong.**

"That is true," agreed Matthew.

"Sounds like Mum, paid more attention to Dad. that she didn't even realise," says Rose smiling.

**It will take an awful lot of weeping to convince anyone to overlook him.**

**We have to stand for a few minutes in the doorway of the train while the cameras gobble up our images, then we're allowed inside and the doors close mercifully behind us. The train begin to move at once.**

**The speed initially takes my breath away. Of course, I've never been on a train, as travel between the districts is forbidden except for officially sanctioned duties.**

"Wait a minute does that mean that they have never left the district?" asked Ryan confused.

"Guess, They couldn't allow the districts to become to friendly, don't the districts to band together and start another rebellion," says Finn.

"That means if we lived back then we would never have met, never mind becoming friends," says Sophie upset at the thought of never seeing her best friends again.

**For us, that mmainly transporting coal. But this is no ordinary coal train. It's one of the high-speed Capitol models that average 250 miles per hour. Our journey to the Capitol will take less than a day.**

**In school, they tell us the Capitol was built in a place called the Rockies. District 12 was in a region known as Appalachia. Even hundreds of years ago, they mined coal here. Which is why our miners have to dig so deep.**

Ryan let out a huge pretend snore out of boredom. "Can they get get to the good bits now. I hate history in school,I don't need this book shoving it down my throat as well."

**Somehow it all comes back to coal at school. Besides basic reading and maths, most of our instruction is coal-related. Except for the weekly lecture on the history of Panem.**

"What's that class called Capitol evil 101?" says Ryan.

"Probably brainwashing for dummies," says Matthew.

"No that class is probably taught in the Capitol," says Finn.

**It's mostly a lot of blather about what we owe the Capitol. I know there must be more than they're telling us, an actual account of what happened during the rebellion. But I Don't spend much time thinking about it. Whatever the truth is, I don't see how it will help me get food on the table.**

"Wow Mum really doesn't care about anything else in her life but keeping her family alive," says Rose admiring her mother's strength.

"Her Mum won't worry about their survival so it falls upon Mum to do it herself," says Matthew.

"Looks like the country hasn't changed that much, we know as much about our history as Katniss does," says Sophie.

**The tribute train is fancier than even the room in the justice Building. We are each given our own chambers that have a bedroom, a dressing area and a private bathroom with hot and cold running water. We don't have hot water at home, unless we boil it.**

"They don't have hot water," exclaimed Ryan in surprise.

"You see how simply they lived, is it that much of a surprise?" asked Rose.

"Guess not," agreed Ryan.

**There are drawers filled with fine clothes, and Effie Trinket tells me to do anything I want, wear anything I want, everything at my disposal. Just be ready for supper in an hour. I peel off my mother' s blue dress and take a hot shower. I've never had a shower before.**

"Wow she really must stink," says Ryan giggling at his own joke as no one else thought it was rolled her eyes at his attempt of a joke.

**It's like being in summer rain, only warmer. I dress in a dark green shirt and trousers.**

**At the last minute, I remember Madge' s little gold pin. For the first time, I get a look at it. It's as if someone fashioned a small garden bird and then attached a ring around it. The bird is connected to the ring only by Its wing tips. I suddenly recognise it. A Mockingjay.**

"Yep, that's definitely the pin we saw at the house," confirmed Finn.

"Wonder why Mum no longer wears it?" mused Rose.

**They're funny birds and something of a slap in the face to the Capitol. During the rebellion, the Capitol bred a series of genetically altered animals as weapons. The common term for them was muttations, or sometimes mutts for short. One was a special bird called a jabberjay that had the ability to memorize and repeat whole-human conversations. They were homing birds, exclusively male, that were released into regions where the Capitol's enemies were known to be hiding.**

"That kind of bird could give people a big advantage in war, knowing the opposing side's plans before they are put into action," says Finn.

"Birds can easily hide, who would suspect a bird anyway," adds Ryan.

**After the birds gathered words, they'd fly back to centres to be recorded. It took people a while to realise what was going on in the districts, how private conversations were being transmitted. Then, of course, the rebels fed the Capitol endless lies, and the joke was on it.**

"A good plan while it lasted, their secret weapon turned against them, I bet the Capitol fell for the lies hook line and sinker," says Matthew.

**So the centres were shut down and the birds were abandoned to die off in the wild.**

"The poor birds," whined Sophie.

"They were a failed experiment, they weren't supposed to exist in the first place," replied Matthew.

"Yes but that wasn't the birds fault," huffed Sophie.

**Only they didn't die off.**

"Does that make you feel better Sophie?" asked Finn.

"I guess but it's still cruel," says Sophie.

**Instead, the jabberjays mated with female Mockingbirds, creating a whole new species that could replicate both bird whistles and human melodies. They had lost the ability to enunciate words but could still mimic a range of human vocal sounds, from a child's high-pitched warble to a man's deep tones. And they could recreate songs. Not just a few notes, but whole songs with multiple verse, if you had the patience to sing them and if they liked your voice.**

"I like the sound of these birds," says Sophie.

"Mum's pointed them out to me, I tried to sing to them but they never sang back to me, but they always do to Mum," says Rose.

"It says if they like your voice they'll sing back to you, they obviously don't like the sound of cats being strangled," replies Finn laughing, earning a slap over the head from Rose. Everyone else was laughing as well.

"Sorry Rose but he's right," agrees Matthew. Rose huffed but didn't argue, it was no secret that Rose didn't inherit her mother's beautiful singing voice.

**My Father was particularly fond of Mockingjays. When we went hunting, he would whistle or sing complicated songs to them and, after a polite pause, they'd always sing back. Not everyone is treated with such respect. But whenever my father sang, all the birds in the area would fall silent and listen.**

"Guess that's where you get your singing voice from then Matthew," says Finn.

"I don't sing nearly as well as Mum or Grandpa did," denied Matthew but he was blushing at the compliment.

"Yes you do," argued everyone else.

**His voice was that beautiful, high and clear and so filled with life it made you want to laugh and cry at the same time. I could never bring myself to continue the practice after he was gone. Still, there's something comforting about the little bird. It's like having a piece of my father with me, protecting me.**

"Mum has always been particularly fond of that bird, I can see why now, it was a connection between her and her Dad," noted Rose.

**I fasten the pin on to my shirt, and with the dark green fabric as a background, I can almost imagine the mockingjay flying through the trees.**

**Effie Trinket comes to collect me for supper. I follow her through the narrow, rocking corridor into a dining room with polished panelled walls. There's a table where all the dishes are highly breakable. Peeta Mellark sits waiting for us, the chair next to him empty.**

"Why does she always use his full name? Does she think that we've already forgotten who he is?" asks Ryan confused.

"I noticed that, she does the same with Effie," says Finn.

"She probably wants to show that they are not friends, well not yet they aren't," says Matthew.

"**Where's Haymitch?" asks Effie Trinket brightly.**

"Probably passed out somewhere," Ryan replied for her.

"**Last time I saw him, he said he was going to take a nap," says Peeta.**

"**Well it's been an exhausting day," says Effie Trinket. I think she's relieved by Haymitch's absence and who can blame her?**

"Are you kidding, Haymitch is a blast," says Ryan. He particularly bonded with Haymitch, when he was given his first alcoholic drink by Haymitch when he was sixteen, much to the horror of his parents.

**The supper comes in course. A thick carrot soup, green salad, lamb chops and mashed potatoes, cheese and fruit, a chocolate cake.**

"This is making me hungry," complained Finn.

"Everything makes you hungry," countered Rose.

**Throughout the meal, Effie Trinket keeps reminding us to save space because there's more to come. But I'm stuffing myself because I've never had food like this, so good and so much, and because probably the best thing I can do between now and the games is put on a few pounds.**

"Mum isn't used to food like this, so of course she's going to enjoy it," says Matthew.

"Anyway, if you're going to die soon, you might as well enjoy the luxuries while you can," says Ryan. This upset Rose, who didn't like to think of her Mum potentially dying, even though she knows it won't happen. "I mean for the other tributes," Ryan defends himself on his little slip up even though no one says anything.

"**At least you two have decent manners," says Effie as we're finishing the main course. "The pair last year ate everything with their hands like a couple of savages. It completely upset my digestion.**

"Aww, the poor little lamb, did the bad people affect her dinner?" says Ryan sarcastically causing everyone to laugh at this.

"Mum isn't going to like that, I bet those children were from the Seam," says Rose.

"I think, their table manners were last things on those children's mind last year," says Matthew.

**The pair last year were two kids from the Seam who'd never, not one day of their lives, had enough to eat. And when they did have food, table manners were surely the last thing on their minds. Peeta's a baker's son. My mother taught Prim and me to eat properly, so yes, I can handle a fork and knife. But I hate, Effie Trinket's comment so much I make a point of eating the rest of the meal with my fingers. Then I wipe my hands on the tablecloth. This makes her purse her lips tightly together.**

Everyone laughed at this, it was typical Katniss. "Of course Mum, would do something like that to upset Effie," said Rose still laughing.

"Deserves her right as well," says Matthew.

**Now that the meals over, I'm fighting to keep the food down. I can see Peeta's looking a little green too.**

"Her bodies not used to eating so much at once, and the food is richer than she used to," explains Finn.

**Neither of our stomachs is used to such rich fare. But if I can hold down Greasy Sae's concoction of mice meat, pig entrails, and tree bark – a winter specialty – I'm determined to hang onto this.**

"That sounds appetising," says Sophie who also looks green at the thought of Greasy Sae's food.

"The things people will eat when their starving," says Finn.

**We go to another compartment to watch the recap of the reaping's across Panem. They try and stagger them throughout the day so a person could conceivably watch the whole thing live, but only the Capitol could really do that, since none of them have to attend reaping's themselves.**

"Also the only people in Panem who would want to watch the reaping's live, the other Districts are forced to watch them," commented Matthew.

**One by one, we see the other reaping's, the names called, the volunteers stepping forward or, more often, not. We examine the faces of the kids who will be our competition.**

"Best to know now, who you're going to be fighting, who will be strong competitors and who will be the weaklings," says Finn.

**A few stand out in my mind. A monstrous boy who lunges forward to volunteer from District 2.**

"My money is on him," says Ryan absentmindedly. Not realising what he said until everyone is staring at him. "I mean if Aunt Katniss and Uncle Peeta weren't in it, because no one can beat them. But he does look like he could be trouble."

"I agree, I mean he does look like he could be a problem," says Finn.

"A bit eager isn't he, I mean he's signing up for his own death," says Sophie.

"He probably doesn't think he can lose, thinks that he has the whole games in the bag," says Matthew.

"Well that just makes him cocky," says Rose.

**A fox-faced girl with sleek red hair from District 5.**

"What a flattering description that is?" says Sophie.

**A boy with a crippled foot from District 10.**

"Well he'll be easy to kill," says Ryan.

"That's horrible," exclaims Sophie at him.

"Don't blame me, blame the Capitol they're the ones who came up with these games. Besides it's a fact, you can't run with a crippled leg and people can catch you easily," explains Ryan.

**And most hauntingly, a twelve year old girl from District 11. She has dark brown skin and eyes but other than that, she's very like Prim in size and demeanour.**

"That poor girl, it's just not right sending a little girl like that in such a horrible battle, that will most likely kill her," says Rose.

"Is it right, to send any of these kids into such a battle?" asks Matthew.

"No, but the fact that she is only twelve makes it even worse somehow. Probably because she has next to no chance to win," says Rose.

"She might?" argued Sophie.

"Against children older and a lot bigger than her, including ones that have trained for this their whole lives," Rose asked and Sophie shook her head as an answer.

**Only when she mounts the stage and they ask for volunteers, all you can hear is the wind whistling through the decrepit buildings around her. There is no willing to take her place.**

"Why wouldn't anyone volunteer for her?" asked Sophie horrified that no one wanted to save this little girl.

"She probably either had no siblings, or they were younger than her," says Finn.

"I would volunteer for her, even if I didn't know her," says Sophie confidently.

"Would you, would you really. Would you sacrifice your life for the sake of a complete stranger?" asks Finn.

Sophie struggled for a reply but couldn't find one she finally just said, "I don't know."

"Exactly it's easier said than done," says Finn.

**Last of all, they show District 12. Prim being called me running forward to volunteer. You can't miss the desperation in my voice as I shove Prim behind me, as if I'm afraid no one will hear and they'll take Prim away. But of course, they do hear. I see Gale pulling her off me and watch myself mount the stage.**

"God why do they have to recap this?" says Sophie grabbing a tissue.

**The commentators are not sure what to say about the crowd's refusal to applaud. The silent salute. One says, that District 12 has always been a bit backward but that local customs can be charming.**

"District 12 aren't backwards, it's the Capitol that's backwards," shouts Rose at the book.

"Uh Rosie, they can't hear you," says Finn.

**As if on cue, Haymitch falls off the stage, and they groan comically. Peeta's name is drawn, and he quietly takes his place. We shake hands. They cut to the anthem again, and the programme ends.**

**Effie Trinket is disgruntled about the state her wig was in.**

"Is that all she cares about how she looks?" complains Sophie.

"I think the Capitol is very big on appearances," says Finn.

"**Your Mentor has a lot to learn about presentation. A lot about televised behaviour."**

"I don't think Haymitch gives a shit about how he looks on camera and how he's supposed to act," says Ryan.

**Peeta unexpectedly laughs. "He was drunk," says Peeta. "He's drunk every year."**

"**Every day," I add.**

"He hasn't changed that much as he," says Sophie.

"I don't know, he definitely doesn't drink that much anymore. I mean he still drinks, maybe more than he should, but he's never that bad around us," Rose defends him. Haymitch was like an Uncle to her and Matthew.

**I can't help but smirk a little. Effie Trinket makes it sound like Haymitch just has somewhat rough manners that could be corrected with a few tips by her.**

"To be fair, Haymitch's manners aren't exactly any better when he is sober," says Matthew.

"**Yes," hisses Effie Trinket. "How odd that you find it amusing. You know your mentor is your lifeline to the world in these games. The one who advises you, lines up your sponsors, and dictates the presentation of any gifts. Haymitch can well be the difference between your life and your death!"**

"What are sponsors?" asks Sophie.

"Don't know; guess we'll find out though. So the Mentors are really important then," says Finn.

"How the hell did Mum and Dad win with Uncle Haymitch being their mentor?" asks Matthew, everyone laughed.

**Just then, Haymitch staggers into the compartment. "I miss supper?" he says in a slurred voice. Then he vomits all over the expensive carpet and falls in the mess.**

"Way to prove people wrong Haymitch," laughs Ryan.

"But he still makes the best entrance," says Finn.

"**So laugh away!" says Effie Trinket. She hops in her pointy shoes around the pool of vomit and flees the room.**

"That's the end of the chapter," says Sophie putting the book down.

"Do you mind if we take a break?" asks Ryan.

"Yeah of course," says Rose. Ryan didn't anything else just left the room immediately.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author Notes: **How amazing was Catching Fire? I loved it! Everyone was amazing loved Jena Malone as Johanna, better than I imagined and Sam Claflin, don't care what anyone says he is gorgeous.

Have to also say Jennifer Lawrence, now that girl is on Fire, I have lost words on how to say how incredible that girl is, she blows me away every time she is on screen. A Oscar winner at 23 and if the buzz is true about American Hustle she is looking at Oscar nomination number 3, which would make her the youngest actress with that many Oscar nominations, what a achievement. Also from what I've heard, she has a very good shot of getting back to back wins. That is our leading lady, Twilight could never say that could it.

Oh yeah loved Josh Hutcherson as well, Liam Hemsworth not so much but that might be the amount of screen time he gets, I don't know.

**Chapter 5**

Ryan lay on Matthew's bed, he knew Matthew wouldn't mind. He stared at the ceiling counting the patterns. He tried to process the information that he had heard, so according to these books it wasn't only Uncle Peeta and Aunt Katniss who had participated in these games but his own mother. To hear that two people that he counted part of his family had gone through these horrible games was a terrifying thought but to know his mother had won these games was a whole different story. He said to his friends that he was Ok, but he wasn't, he hated the idea that his mother had killed people, under circumstances he could never know but she still killed them. Why hadn't she told him?

There was a knock on the door, not needing to know who it was he shouts, "go away Sophie." Sophie like usual ignored him and let herself in.

"How did you know it was me?" Sophie asked standing next to the bed, with her hands on her hips.

"It's always you," he answers simply.

"Move up," Sophie demanded. Ryan dutifully shuffled up and Sophie climbed next to him. "Want to talk about it?"

"No," Ryan mutters.

"Too bad, I'm not letting you brood on your own," Sophie ignored him, she only meant her question rhetorically anyway.

"My mother killed people," Ryan started off, knowing he had no choice but to talk about it.

"It's not like she had a choice," Sophie said in Johanna's defence.

"There's always a choice," argued Ryan.

"In normal situations yes I'd agree, but I think we can both agree on the fact that these aren't normal situations. It's not like she killed because she wanted to," Sophie said.

"You don't know that," says Ryan.

"Yes I do and so do you, your Mum is not some kind of sadistic monster, she did what she had to do, it was literally kill or be killed," explains Sophie.

"Doesn't change the fact that she killed someone," says Ryan.

"So if you were attacked you wouldn't shoot someone to defend yourself. Truth is these are awful experiences that no one should go through, your mother did what she had to do, we don't know what we would do if we were ever in her shoes."

"But why didn't she tell me?" Ryan asked.

"Because she was afraid of how you would react and the way you're reacting right now I don't blame her. Your Mum doesn't want you to see that side of her. Also remember Matthew and Rose are going through the exact same thing, but going through a lot more detail," says Sophie.

"Your right, would you just give me a moment to think, I'll come back through in a minute," Ryan says. Sophie nods and leaves the room.

XOXOXOXOXOX

Ten minutes later Ryan sorted himself out and joined the others in the living room where they had made coffee for everyone.

"You Ok Ryan?" asks Rose passing him a cup of Coffee.

"Yeah I am now, just wasn't expecting that," Ryan answers accepting the coffee from her. "Whose turn is it to read anyway?"

"Mine," says Matthew holding up the book.

"Well let's carry on," Ryan said.

**For a few moments, Peeta and I take in the scene of our mentor trying to rise out of the slippery vile stuff from his stomach. The reek of vomit and raw spirits almost bring my dinner up. We exchange a glance. Obviously Haymitch isn't much, but Effie Trinket is right about one thing; once we're in the arena, he's all we've got.**

"What a comforting thought that must be?" says Rose.

**As if by some unspoken agreement, Peeta and I each take one of Haymitch's arms and help him to his feet.**

"I wouldn't help, leave him to clean up his own mess," says Sophie disgusted by Haymitch's behaviour.

"But like Aunt Katniss said, Haymitch is the only one who can her survive the arena, if she wants Haymitch to help her out she has to help him out," explains Finn.

"What help can Haymitch be when he's intoxicated all the time?" argues Sophie.

"He must have done something right, both Aunt Katniss and Uncle Peeta came out alive," Finn points out, Sophie doesn't argue the point any further.

"**I tripped?" Haymitch asks. "Smells bad."**

"Well no Duh, you tripped into your own pool of vomit," says Ryan laughing already sounding a bit like his old self.

**He wipes his hand on his nose, smearing his face with vomit.**

"EWW!" exclaims Sophie in disgust.

"**Let's get you back to your room," says Peeta. "Clean you up a bit."**

**We half lead, half carry Haymitch back to his compartment. Since we can't exactly set him down on the embroidered bedspread,**

"Oh I would, just to see Effie's face when she sees it," says Ryan.

"That would be funny, serves her right anyway for leaving them alone to deal with Haymitch," Finn carries on.

**We haul him into the bathtub and turn the shower on him. He hardly notices.**

"**It's Ok," Peeta says to me. "I'll take it from here."**

"What a gentleman?" swoons Sophie.

"Don't care how un-gentlemanly like it is, there is no way in hell I'd wash a grown man on my own," says Matthew.

"Same here, Uncle Peeta is clearly trying to earn some points with Aunt Katniss here," agrees Ryan.

"Or he's just being nice," offers Rose.

"Sorry Rosie but no man is that nice for no reason," says Finn.

**I can't help feeling a little grateful, since the last thing I want to do is strip down Haymitch, wash the vomit out of his chest hair, and tuck him into bed.**

"Yeah I can't imagine that would be a nice experience," commented Rose.

"What a way to start the friendship off that would be?" says Finn.

"It's not like Haymitch has that much modesty left anyway," says Sophie.

**Possibly Peeta is trying to make a good impression on him, to be his favourite once the games begin.**

"Sorry Mum, but Uncle Haymitch totally prefers Dad over you," says Matthew.

"Does that even matter?" asks Rose.

"Well yeah, if he has to pick one of his tributes to get out alive, I'm sure popularity plays a part," says Finn.

"Or whichever one has the better chance of winning," argues Rose.

"Well Dad could win," says Matthew.

"I love Dad and all but if I was placing bets on who would win in a fight Dad or Mum, Mum would win every time," says Rose.

"Dad is way stronger than Mum, all those years working in the bakery," points out Matthew.

"He wouldn't get close enough to fight her, she would shoot an arrow in his chest before he could even think about it," says Rose.

"Sorry mate but Aunt Katniss would win, she wouldn't miss a thing with a bow and arrow in her hand," says Ryan.

"Also Uncle Peeta is to gentle to kill Aunt Katniss," adds Finn. Matthew grumbled but never pressed the argument.

**But judging by the state he's in, Haymitch will have no memory of this tomorrow.**

"**All right," I say. "I can send one of the capitol people to help you."**

"Now that would be a sight to see, one of the capitol clowns cleaning up a vomit drenched Haymitch," says Ryan.

**There's any number on the train. Cooking for us. Waiting on us. Guarding us. Taking care of us is their jobs.**

"Wait a second the Capitol actually work, I thought they just sat back and watch as the Districts did everything," Ryan said.

"**No. I don't want them," says Peeta.**

"Why wouldn't want any help?" asks Sophie.

"Probably be embarrassed at anyone else seeing someone from his own district in that state," says Finn.

**I nod and head to my own room. I understand how Peeta feels. I can't stand the sight of the Capitol people myself. But making them deal with Haymitch might be a small form of revenge.**

"Exactly, it's the least they can do, after forcing them into such a horrible game," says Ryan.

"That's not everyone's in the Capitol's fault though," points out Sophie.

"But they aren't exactly doing anything to stop the games though are they," says Ryan.

**So I'm pondering the reason why he insists on taking care of Haymitch and all of a sudden I think, it's because he's being kind. Just as he was kind to give me the bread.**

"That's Dad for you, always thinking of others," says Matthew.

**The idea pulls me up short. A kind Peeta Mellark is far more dangerous to me than an unkind one.**

"How is Peeta being kind, a dangerous thing?" asks Sophie confused.

"Because it must be a lot harder to kill a nice guy than an ass hole," says Matthew.

**Kind people have a way of working their way inside me and rooting there. And I can't let Peeta do this. Not where we're going. So I decide, from this moment on, to have as little as possible to do with the baker's son.**

"Well it obviously doesn't work, twenty years on their married with two children," says Ryan.

**When I get back to my room, the train is pausing at a platform to refuel. I quickly open the window, toss the cookies Peeta's father gave me out of the train, and slam the glass shut.**

"What a waste?" shouted Finn scandalised by the fact that Katniss was wasting food.

"I can't believe that Katniss would waste perfectly good food like that, especially how scarce it was back then," says Sophie.

"She doesn't want anything that reminds her of Dad around her," says Matthew.

"She'll have Peeta around her constantly from now until the games begin, he's not exactly something that she can ignore," Ryan says.

**No more. No more of either of them.**

**Unfortunately, the packet of cookies hits the ground and bursts open in a patch of dandelions by the track. I only see the image for a moment, because the train is off again, but it's enough. Enough to remind me of that other dandelion in the school yard years ago…**

"Well that promise, didn't last long, a few minutes and she's already thinking of Uncle Peeta," says Ryan.

**I had just turned away from Peeta Mellark's bruised face when I saw the dandelion and I knew hope wasn't lost. I plucked it carefully and hurried home. I grabbed a bucket and Prim's hand and headed to the meadow and yes, it was dotted with the golden headed weeds. After we'd harvested those, we scrounged along inside the fence for probably a mile until we'd filled the bucket with the dandelion greens, stems and flowers. That night, we gorged ourselves on dandelion salad and the rest of the bakery bread.**

"There's such a thing as Dandelion salad?" asks Finn.

"Probably not, but back then I guess you just ate what you could find," says Rose.

"Guess that's one meal I won't be trying," says Finn.

**"What else?" Prim asked me. "What other food can we find?"**

"I don't think, dandelions count as food," said Finn.

**"All kind of things," I promised her. "I just have to remember them."**

**My mother had a book she brought with her from the apothecary shop. The pages were made of old parchment and covered in ink drawings of plants. Neat handwritten blocks told their names, where to gather them, when they came to bloom, and their medical uses. But my father added other entries to the book. Plants for eating, not healing. Dandelions, pokeweed, wild onions, pines.**

"That sounds delicious," said Finn pulling a face. "Give me a nice fish dinner any day."

"Well beggars can't be choosers, I think they'd rather eat that than starve," says Rose.

**Prim and I spent the rest of the night pouring over those pages.**

**The next day, we were off school. For a while I hung around the edges of the meadow, but finally I worked up the courage to go under the fence. It was the first time I'd been alone, without my father's weapons to protect me. But I retrieved the small bow and arrows from a hollow tree. I probably didn't go more than twenty metres into the woods that day. Most of the time, I perched up in the branches of an old oak, hoping for game to come by.**

"This is why I suck at hunting, I have no patience for it," says Finn.

"Or the fact that you have no accuracy with a bow and arrow," says Rose earning a dirty look from Finn.

**After several hours, I had the good luck to kill a rabbit. I'd shot a few rabbits before, with my father's guidance. But this I'd done on my own.**

"Yeah there's nothing like your first kill," Rose reminiscences but quickly noticing the strange looks she got from her friends and realised what she had just said and went red. "I mean in hunting and killing your first rabbit," she quickly backtracked.

"That doesn't make you sound any less of a psychopath Rosie," says Finn laughing at her face.

**We hadn't had meat in months. **

"Imagine not having meat for months, Finn goes crazy if he doesn't have meat for two days," says Ryan. Finn nodded in agreement.

**The sight of the rabbit seemed to stir something in my mother. She roused herself, skinned the carcass, and made a stew with the meat and some more greens Prim had gathered. Then she acted confused and went back to bed, but when the stew was done, we made her eat a bowl.**

"Probably reminds her of when her husband used to bring in rabbits after he had been hunting," says Finn knowingly. He always remembers the face after Finn had gone fishing for the first time and shown of the massive fish he caught proudly, she looked proud but also sad at the same time. Annie had only smiled but muttered mostly to her, 'just like your father' and went up to her room.

**The woods became our saviour, and each day I went further into its arms. It was slow going at first, but I was determined to feed us. I stole eggs from nests, caught fish in nets, and gathered the various plants that sprung beneath my feet. Plants are tricky. Many are edible, but one false mouthful and you're dead. **

"Who would have thought that gardening of all things would be deadly?" says Ryan.

"It's not exactly gardening she's doing, and yes, if you don't know what you're doing it can be dangerous," explained Finn.

**I checked and double checked the plants I harvested with my father's pictures. I kept us alive.**

**Any signs of danger, a distant howl, the inexplicable break of a branch, sent me flying back to the fence at first. Then I began to risk climbing trees to escape the wild dogs that quickly got bored and moved on.**

"I need to learn to climb trees like my mum," says Rose wistfully, she could only get as high as the first branch but refused to go any higher.

"Oh no you don't, last time you tried to climb a tall tree to save a cat that had got caught up there, you fell and broke your arm," said Finn. Remembering how upset Rose was that she wasn't allowed to go into the woods for six weeks until her arm healed.

"Well I obviously wouldn't do that again," Rose brushed of the idea immediately.

"Rose, you're good at many things but tree climbing isn't one of them, you don't have enough balance to," Matthew said agreeing with Finn.

**Bears and cats lived deeper in, perhaps disliking the sooty reek of our district.**

"District 12, doesn't reek," said Matthew upset.

"Well…" Ryan started but stopped when he realised that would be a bad idea.

**On the eighth of May, I went to the Justice building, signed up for my tesserae, and pulled home my first batch or grain and oil in Prim's toy wagon. On the eighth of every month, I was entitled to do the same. I couldn't stop hunting and gathering of course.**

"Well of course not, grain and oil isn't exactly a well-balanced diet," said Finn.

"I don't think anyone back then was on a well-balanced diet," reasoned Sophie.

"Capitol citizens probably were, but grain and oil, is not enough to live on for anyone," said Finn.

**The grain was not enough to live on, and there were other things to buy, soap and milk and thread. What we didn't absolutely have to eat, I began to trade at the hob. It was frightening to enter that place without my father at my side, but people respected him, and they accepted me. Game was game, after all, no matter who'd shot it.**

"Didn't people find it weird that such a young girl was hunting animals like that?" asked Matthew.

"I did it," said Rose.

"Not until you were over fifteen and not without Mum by your side you didn't, Mum didn't let you go out on your own until you were seventeen and that was after months of you begging her and the promise that you took Finn with you," argued Matthew.

"Much help Finn was, he has as much stealth as a bull in a china shop," Rose grumbled. Finn opened his mouth to argue but closed it again when he realised she was right.

"It's as Katniss said, people didn't care where the meat came from, as long as it was good enough to sell and eat," said Sophie.

**I also sold at the back doors of the wealthier clients in town, trying to remember what my father had told me and learning a few new tricks as well. The butcher would buy my rabbits but not squirrels. The baker enjoyed squirrel but would only trade for one if his wife wasn't around.**

"Who actually enjoys squirrel?" wondered Finn.

"It probably wasn't the squirrel he liked, but wanted to help Mum out," answered Matthew.

**The head peacekeeper loved wild turkey. The mayor had a passion for strawberries. **

**In late summer, I was washing up in a pond when I noticed the plants growing around me. Tall with leaves like arrow heads. Blossoms with three white petals. I knelt down in the water, my fingers digging into the soft mud, and I pulled up handfuls of the roots. Small bluish tubers that don't look like much but boiled or baked are as good as any potato. "Katniss," I said aloud.**

"I think she's finally losing it, she's calling out for herself," whispered Ryan.

"She's talking about the plant she was named after idiot," said Rose.

**It's the plant I was named for. And I heard my father's voice joking, "As long as you can find yourself, you'll never starve."**

"Look she is losing it, she's hearing voices," said Ryan laughing but no one else laughed and Matthew just carried on reading.

**I spent hours stirring up the pond bed with my toes and a stick, gathering the tubers that floated to the top. That night, we feasted on fish and Katniss roots until we were all, for the first time in months, full.**

**Slowly my mother returned to us. She began to clean and cook and preserve some of the food I brought in for winter. People traded with us or paid money for her medical remedies. One day, I heard her singing.**

**Prim was thrilled to have her back, but I kept watching, waiting for her to disappear on us again.**

"I know the feeling," muttered Finn. Even though it didn't sound like his Mum wasn't as bad as Katniss' mother, but he knew the feeling of stepping on egg shells around his mother, not wanting to upset her too much. Afraid anything he said or did could set of one of her episodes.

**I didn't trust her. And some small gnarled place inside me hated her for her weakness, for her neglect, for the months she had put us through.**

"It's understandable though, if you look how bad Aunt Katniss' life was, I think part of her would resent her mother, for forcing her into that position," said Finn. Grateful that his mother wasn't like that, and also glad that he had many people who were willing to help him out if he needed it.

**Prim forgave her, but I had taken a step back from my mother, put up a wall to protect myself from needing her, and nothing was ever the same between us again.**

"It was probably easier for someone as young as Prim to forgive her mother, she didn't need to do what Katniss did, to keep her family alive," said Sophie.

**Now I was going to die without that ever being set right.**

"You're not going to die, god stop talking like that," Rose complained.

"Look at it from her perspective Rosie," reasoned Finn.

"Mum is talking like a loser, Mum is not a loser," said Rose.

**I thought of how I had yelled at her today in the Justice building. I had told her I loved her too though. So maybe it would all balance out.**

"I'm sure she knew how she felt," said Sophie.

"It's not like grandma didn't deserve to be shouted at anyway, she needed to make sure that she would look after Prim.

**For a while I stand staring out of the train window, wishing I could open it again but unsure what would happen at such high speed. I see the lights of another district. Seven? Ten? I don't know. I think about the people in their houses, settling in for bed. I imagine my home, with its shutters drawn tight. What are they doing now, my mother and Prim? Were they able to eat supper? The fish stew and the strawberries? Or did it lie untouched on their plates? Did they watch the recap of the day's events on the battered old TV that sits on the table against the wall? Surely there were more tears. Is my mother holding up, being strong for Prim? Or has she already started to slip away, leaving the weight of the world on my sister's fragile shoulders?**

"Her Mum had promised that she would be strong and keep it together for Prim though," said Sophie.

"But promises like that, when your mentally ill like Katniss' Mother is, can be easily broken, sometimes it can't be helped," said Finn.

"That's the last thing Mum needs to worry about, she should concentrate on the games and keeping herself alive," moaned Matthew.

**Prim will undoubtedly sleep with my mother tonight. The thought of that scruffy old buttercup posting himself on the bed to watch over Prim comforts me. If she cries, he will nose his way into her arms and curl up there until she calms down and falls asleep. I'm so glad I didn't drown him.**

"See cats are good for something, they will comfort their owner if their upset," said Sophie delighted to hear about Buttercup being seen in a better light.

"Doesn't change the fact that the thing is still butt ugly," Ryan teased her, knowing how upset it makes Sophie when he says something nasty about an animal.

**Imagining my home makes me ache with loneliness. This day has been endless. Could Gale and I have been eating blackberries only this morning? It seems like a lifetime ago. Like a long dream that deteriorated into a nightmare. Maybe, if I go to sleep, I will wake up back in District 12, where I belong.**

"Don't worry you'll be back in District 12 soon enough," said Rose trying to comfort her mother even though she knew she couldn't hear her.

**Probably the drawers hold any number of nightgowns, but I strip off my shirt and trousers and climb into bed in my underwear. The sheets are made of soft, silky fabric. A thick, fluffy quilt gives immediate warmth.**

**If I'm going to cry, now is the time to do it.**

"I don't think I've ever seen Mum cry," commented Matthew.

"Mum isn't one to let other people see her cry," said Rose.

**By morning, I'll be able to wash the damage done by the tears from my face. But no tears come. I'm too tired or to numb to cry. The only thing I feel is a desire to be somewhere else. So I let the train rock me into oblivion.**

**Grey light is leaking through the curtains when the rapping rouses me. I hear Effie's voice calling me to rise.**

"Here I thought that Effie couldn't rap, you learn something new every day," said Ryan, but no one laughed at his sad attempt at a joke.

**"Up, up, up! It's going to be a big, big, big day!"**

"Isn't she a little bit too hyper for that early in the day," says Matthew, who unlike his parents and his sister is not a morning person.

"I think she might be on drugs," answers Finn who just like Matthew hates to get up early in the morning.

"Whatever stuff she's taking I definitely want some, that shit must be good," says Matthew.

**I try and imagine, for a moment, what it must be like inside that woman's head. What thoughts fill her waking hours? What dreams come to her at night? I have no idea.**

"Why do I imagine that all she sees in her head is a kitten playing with a piece of string?" asks Ryan.

"Well it definitely won't be something complex and meaningful," says Sophie to everyone's surprise, it really wasn't like her to say something so bitchy.

**I put the green outfit back on since it's not really dirty, just slightly crumpled from spending the night on the floor.**

"Isn't that like committing a cardinal sin in the Capitol?" says Finn.

**My fingers trace the circle around the little gold mockingjay and I think of the woods, and of my father, and of my mother and Prim waking up, having to get on with things. I slept in the elaborate braided hair my mother did for the reaping and it doesn't look too bad, so I leave it up.**

"Isn't she at least going to brush her hair first," asked Sophie outraged at the thought of going out in public and not making a little bit of an effort.

"Does Mum look like she cares about being glamorous?" asks Rose.

"Yeah Mum has always been proud of being the exact opposite of the Capitol," agreed Matthew.

**We can't be far from the Capitol now. And once we reach the city, my stylist will dictate my look for the opening ceremonies tonight anyway. I just hope I get one who doesn't think nudity is the last word in fashion.**

"What kind of crack head have they had styling tributes in the past?" asked Finn.

"Probably one that knows that sex sells," answers Ryan.

"Ryan please, that's my Mum you're talking about," moans Matthew.

**As I enter the dining car, Effie Trinket brushes by me with a cup of black coffee. She's muttering obscenities under her breath. Haymitch, his face puffy and red from the previous day's indulgences, is chuckling. Peeta holds a roll and looks embarrassed.**

"He showered a grown man who was covered in sick, yeah I'll say he's embarrassed," said Ryan.

**"Sit down! Sit down!" says Haymitch waving me over. The moment I slide into my chair I'm served an enormous platter of food. Eggs, ham, piles of fried potatoes. A tureen of fruit sits in ice to keep it chilled. The basket of bread they set before me would keep my family going for a week.**

"Oh I love breakfast," said Finn.

"You love all meal times," pointed out Rose.

"Well yeah, eating is my favourite time of the day," Said Finn. (extra points if anyone can tell me who I'm quoting.)

**There's an elegant glass of Orange juice. At least I think its Orange juice. I've only tasted an orange once on New year's Day when my father brought me one as a treat.**

"Don't worry Aunt Katniss you're not missing much," said Ryan who dislikes all fruit.

"Imagine only having an orange once in your life," said Sophie.

"Still isn't much of a treat is it," argued Ryan.

**A cup of coffee. My mother adores coffee, which we could almost never afford, but it tastes bitter and thin to me.**

"Mum still hates Coffee as well," said Matthew.

**A rich brown cup of something I've never seen.**

**"They call it hot chocolate," says Peeta. "It's good."**

"She's never had hot chocolate before, man she hasn't lived," says Finn. All the children nod in agreement.

"Nothing better than a hot chocolate on a cold winter's night," Sophie carried on.

"With lots of whipped cream and marshmallows on top," Ryan finished off.

**I take a sip of the hot, sweet, creamy liquid and a shudder runs through me. Even though the rest of the meal beckons, I ignore it until I've drained my cup. Then I stuff down every mouthful I can hold, which is a substantial amount, being careful not to overdo it on the richest stuff. One time, my mother told me that I always eat like I'll never see food again.**

"Sounds like Finn eating that does," laughs Rose.

"It could be the case with Katniss though," says Sophie morbidly.

**And I said, "I won't unless I bring it home." That shut her up.**

"Bit harsh wasn't it, sure her Mum didn't mean anything by it," said Sophie.

"She was right though," argued Rose.

**When my stomach feels like it's about to split open, I lean back and take in my breakfast companions. Peeta is still eating, breaking off bits of roll and dipping them in the hot chocolate. Haymitch hasn't paid much attention to the platter, but he's knocking back a glass of red juice that he keeps thinning with a clear liquid from a bottle.**

"At that time in the morning," says Sophie shocked at Haymitch's behaviour.

"It's Haymitch," was the only response that Ryan would give her.

"But he's around impressionable youth," complained Sophie.

"They're about to enter in a game of death, I highly doubt that someone drinking early in the morning is going to damage them that much," Ryan pointed out.

"Sophie's right, he never drinks like that in front of us in the morning," says Rose.

"Doesn't mean that he doesn't drink in the morning at all," says Finn.

**Judging by the fumes, it's some kind of spirit.**

"Well no duh, what else would be coming out of a bottle of Haymitch's?" says Ryan.

**I don't know Haymitch, but I've seen him often enough in the hob, tossing handfuls of money on the counter of the woman who sells white liquor. He'll be incoherent by the time we reach the Capitol.**

**I realise I detest Haymitch.**

"Strong words for someone you hardly know," says Sophie.

"He hasn't made much of a first impression though has he," says Matthew.

"I don't think Mum hates Haymitch anymore anyway," says Rose.

"But I don't think she actually likes him either," says Matthew.

"Well that's good I don't think he likes her that much either, he likes Dad though," says Rose now laughing and everyone joins in.

**No wonder the District 12 tributes never stand a chance.**

"I don't think you can blame that all on Haymitch though, he can't make people win if they have no skills or survival instincts," says Finn.

**It isn't just that we've been underfed and lack training. Some of our tributes have still been strong enough to make a go of it. But we rarely get sponsors and he's a big part why. The rich people who back tributes – either because they're betting on them or simply for the bragging rights of picking a winner – expect someone classier than Haymitch to deal with. **

"Ok maybe it is Haymitch's fault," relents Finn.

"Ok so I'm going to ask again, how did Mum and Dad win, if Haymitch was really that useless? I get that Mum is strong and smart but so are other tributes that probably have loads of people backing them," asks Matthew.

"Maybe they found a way to get Haymitch to stop drinking and help them," says Sophie, everyone stared at her like she'd gone crazy.

"Haymitch stop drinking?" Ryan says incredulously.

"It could happen," says Sophie quietly.

"**So you're supposed to give us advice," I say to Haymitch.**

"Straight to the point, just like Mum, not one for small talk," says Matthew.

"I would be the same, why waste time, she needs as much advice as she can get," says Rose.

"**Here's some advice. Stay alive," says Haymitch, and then bursts out laughing.**

"Well that was helpful," says Finn rolling his eyes.

"But that's the best advice he can give them, stay alive," says Ryan.

"But it's not that specific is it, no advice on how to do just that, he's just pointing out the obvious there," argues Matthew.

**I exchange a look with Peeta before I remember I'm having nothing more to do with him. I'm surprised to see the hardness in his eyes.**

"That's not like Dad, his eyes are always so soft and gentle," says Rose.

"Haymitch probably pissed him off just as much as Mum, he probably doesn't find jokes about his life that funny," says Matthew.

"**That's very funny," says Peeta. Suddenly he lashes out at the glass in Haymitch's hand. It shatters on the floor, sending the blood-red liquid running towards the back of the train. "Only not to us."**

"Bloody hell, didn't think that Uncle Peeta had it in him," says Ryan.

"Yeah Dad is usually mild mannered, but he has quite the temper when pushed over the edge," says Matthew.

"He's not as quick as Mum is at losing her temper though," adds Rose.

**Haymitch considers this a moment, then punches Peeta on the jaw, knocking him from his chair.**

"Ass hole, how dare he punch my Dad, I'm so shouting at him next time I see him," fumed Rose.

"And how are you going to explain how you know all this?" asks Finn, Rose quickly quietens down.

**When he turns back to reach for the spirits, I drive my knife into the table between his hand and the bottle, barely missing his fingers.**

"Don't bother Rose, looks like Aunt Katniss is getting payback for you," says Ryan.

**I brace myself to deflect his hit, but it doesn't come. Instead he sits back and squints at us.**

"Probably not used to people coming between him and his alcohol," says Ryan.

"Or anyone putting up a fight," agreed Finn.

"**Well what's this?" asks Haymitch. "Did I actually get a pair of fighters this year?"**

"Damn straight you did and they're not only going to fight but they're going to win," says Rose proudly.

"Well Aunt Katniss is certainly a fighter but I don't class Uncle Peeta as a fighter," argues Ryan, which got a very angry look from both Rose and Matthew. "What it is true?" They still didn't agree with Ryan's assessment but they didn't argue the point anymore.

**Peeta rises from the floor and scoops up a handful of ice from under the fruit tureen. He starts to raise it to the red mark on his jaw.**

"**No," says Haymitch, stopping him. "Let the bruise show. The audience will think you've mixed it up with another tribute before you've even made to the arena."**

"Well that certainly can't hurt, make Peeta look like a tough guy and a fighter before the games even begin," says Ryan.

"**That's against the rules," says Peeta.**

"I didn't think the hunger games have rules minus kill or be killed," said Sophie.

"**Only if they catch you. The bruise will say you fought, you weren't caught, even better," says Haymitch. He turns to me. "Can you hit anything with that knife besides a table?"**

"Of course she can, but she's not as deadly with a knife as she is with a bow and arrow," answers Rose.

"I don't know I wouldn't want to fight Aunt Katniss with a knife or a bow and arrow," says Finn.

**The bow and arrow is my weapon. But I've spent a fair amount of time throwing knives as well. Sometimes, if I've wounded an animal with an arrow, it's better to get a knife into it, too, before I approach it. I realise that if I want Haymitch's attention, this is my moment to make an impression. I yank the knife out of the table, get a grip on the blade, and then throw it into the wall across the room. I was actually hoping to get a good solid stick, but it lodges in the seam between two panels, making me look a lot better than I am.**

"If that doesn't get his attention I don't know what will?" says Matthew proudly.

"Now she's just showing off," says Ryan sulkily.

"Isn't that the point," says Finn.

"Don't listen to Ryan, he just wishes he could throw like that," Rose says.

"Of course I do, how cool would that be," moaned Ryan.

"**Stand over here. Both of you," says Haymitch, nodding to the middle of the room. We obey and he circles us, prodding us like animals at times, checking our muscles, examining our faces. "Well you're not entirely hopeless. Seem fit. And once the stylists get hold of you, you'll be attractive enough."**

"How rude?" shouts Rose insulted for her parents.

"It's Haymitch that's as close to a compliment they will get," says Finn.

"It is Uncle Peeta and Aunt Katniss, they need as much help as they can get in that department," says Ryan grinning. To everyone's surprise it wasn't Rose who slapped Ryan over his head for his comment it was Matthew.

**Peeta and I don't question this. The Hunger Games aren't a beauty contest, but the best looking tributes always seem to pull more Sponsors.**

"Well that's a relief, that means if I was ever in the Hunger games I would have sponsors fighting to sponsor me," says Finn arrogantly flipping his hair. Not that he was particularly arrogant but he loved the rise it got out of red. And from the five shades of red Rose's face was turning it was working.

"**All right, I'll make a deal with you. You don't interfere with my drinking, and I'll stay sober enough to help you," says Haymitch. "But you have to do exactly what I say."**

"That's the best deal they'll ever get with Haymitch, I say they take it," says Sophie.

"In this arena they need all the help they can get, even if that help is Haymitch it's better than nothing," agreed Finn.

**It's not much of a deal, but it's still a giant step forward than ten minutes ago, when we had no guide at all.**

"Haymitch might not be much but he's definitely better than nothing, also he's already been through these games and won them so he must know what he's talking about," agreed Finn.

"That depends on how much of his games he's blocked out with his drinking though," says Sophie.

"I think that's why he drinks is to block out the memories of his games and it must work to some extent or he wouldn't carry on drinking," says Ryan.

**"Fine," says Peeta.**

**"So help us," I say. "When we get to the arena, what's the best strategy at the cornucopia for someone."**

"Bit eager to start isn't she?" says Ryan.

"Wouldn't you be if it was your life on the line?" snapped Rose.

**"One thing at a time. In a few minutes, we'll be pulling into the station. You'll be put in the hands of your stylists. You're not going to like what they do to you. But no matter what it is, don't resist," says Haymitch.**

**"But-" I begin.**

"First thing Aunt Katniss does is resist," Ryan laughed.

"If the stylists are from the capitol I would resist as well, have you seen what they wear it's like they've escaped from the circus," says Sophie shuddering.

**"No buts. Don't resist," says Haymitch. He takes the bottle of spirits from the table and leaves the car.**

"I thought he said he wouldn't drink," shouted Rose annoyed.

"He said he'll stay sober enough to help them out, but he never promised to stop drinking all together. To stop drinking is asking a bit much from Uncle Haymitch," pointed out Matthew.

**As the door swings shut behind him, the car goes dark. There are still a few lights inside, but outside it's as if night has fallen again. I realise we must be in the tunnel that runs up through the mountains into the Capitol. The mountains form a natural barrier between the Capitol and the eastern districts. It is almost impossible to enter from the east except through the tunnels. This geographical advantage was a major factor in the districts losing the war that led to my being a tribute today. Since the rebels had to scale the mountains, they were easy targets for the Capitol's air forces.**

"The mountains also will keep the people from the Capitol separate from the horrors from the districts. They don't know how badly the people from the districts have it compared to the Capitol, I think people will react differently if they saw how badly people were getting treated in the districts," says Finn.

"They have proof every year of how badly the districts are treated, they don't care as long as it doesn't affect them," argued Ryan.

"I don't agree the games are treated just like that in the Capitol like games. They don't see the true horrors involved, they don't realise that this is people's lives they are dealing with, these children are people's Sons and daughters, brothers and sisters and so on," pointed out Finn.

"If they see the games like that then the people from the Capitol are even denser than I thought," huffed Ryan.

"I agree with Ryan, the Capitol just don't care, as long as it doesn't hurt them, then why should they care," Sophie piped in.

"I agree, but I don't believe that everyone in the Capitol will look at things like that, I'm sure there are a few who probably disagree with the Capitol but don't have the power to do anything about it," added Rose.

**Peeta Mellark and i stand in silence as the train speeds along. The tunnel goes on and on an I think of the tonnes of rock separating me from the sky, and my chest tightens. I hate being encased in stone this way. It reminds me of the mines and my father, trapped, unable to reach sunlight, buried forever in the darkness.**

"What a horrible thought that must be?" says Rose.

**The train finally begins to slow and suddenly bright light floods the compartment. We can't help it. Both Peeta and I run to the window to see what we've only seen on television, the Capitol, the ruling city of Panem.**

"Don't see why they're so excited, the Capitol isn't that much of a big deal," said Ryan passively.

"To us no, but to them who have never been to the Capitol before, hell never been outside of Drab district 12," pointed out Finn.

"Hey, district 12 is not drab," complained Matthew.

"Compared to the Capitol it kind of is, especially back then," Finn defended his statement, Matthew just shrugged in reply.

**The cameras haven't lied about its grandeur. If anything, they have not quite captured the magnificence of the glistening buildings in a rainbow of hues that tower into the air, the shiny cars that roll down the wide paved streets, the oddly dressed people with bizarre hair and painted faces who have never missed a meal.**

"If you think that's nice you should see District 7, now that's impressive," Ryan said and Sophie laughed in disbelief.

"Please District 7, has nothing on district 2," argued Sophie.

"Both District 7 and 2 are lovely, but visually not as spectacular as the Capitol," said Finn and both Ryan and Sophie nodded in agreement. "Besides everyone knows that District 4 is clearly the best place to live." Matthew carried on reading before Ryan and Sophie could argue again; this could go on for ages.

**All the colours seem artificial, the pinks too deep, the greens too bright, the yellows painful to the eyes, like the flat round discs of hard candy we can never afford to buy at the tiny sweet shop in District 12.**

**The people begin to point at us as they recognise a tribute train rolling into the city. I step away from the window, sickened by their excitement, knowing that they can't wait to watch us die. But Peeta holds his ground, actually waving and smiling at the gawking crowd. He only stops when the train pulls into the station, blocking us from their view. **

"Smooth move Dad play up for the cameras, make people like you," said Matthew.

"Suck up," Ryan muttered though.

**He sees me staring at him and shrugs. "Who knows?" He says. "One of them may be rich."**

"A suck up he may be, but he knows what they want to see and that's someone likeable, it sounds like these games are partly a popularity contest, Aunt Katniss could learn something from him," commented Finn.

**I have misjudged him. I think of his actions since the reaping began. The friendly squeeze of my hand. His father showing up with the cookies and promising to feed Prim... did Peeta put him up to that? His tears at the station. Volunteering to wash Haunting but then challenging him this morning when apparently the nice-guy approach had failed. And now the waving of the window, already trying to win the crowd. **

"That's not Dad putting on an act, that's just Dad all over, a nice guy," argued Matthew.

"I agree, but I do think that Uncle Peeta knows exactly how to act to get people on his side," says Finn.

**All of the pieces are still fitting together, but I sense he has a plan forming. He hasn't accepted his death. He is already fighting hard to stay alive. Which also means that kind Peeta Mellark, the boy who gave me the bread, is fighting to kill me.**

"Unfortunately she's right, being nice will only take you so far in these games," said Ryan.

"What, no of course she isn't right Dad would never kill Mum," argued Rose dismayed at the thought.

"Normal circumstances yes but these aren't normal circumstances," Finn pointed out.

"Guess we'll see, but that's the end of the chapter," was all Matthew said putting the book down.


End file.
